I WAS BULLIED

The Attempt

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November 19th

Three Weeks since Halloween, I didn't know what to do anymore. For the past three months, the girls have made my life at school a living hell. They have physically threatened me, verbally insulted me, shoved and tripped me over and over non-stop.

Each day, I hear the echo of my mother's voice "Take up for yourself", "ignore them and walk away".

I ignore them easily but sometimes they have cornered me in the hall together as a group and pulled some of my hair, knocked and kicked my books and supplies across the hall. Other students have walked by and laughed because I wasn't doing anything to defend myself. I was afraid to defend myself because I was afraid that they would tackle me and beat me up; "8-9 girls vs 1 girl".

Lunch Time

As usual, I ate with Matthew, Toni, Chante, Khalil, Ashley, and Courtney. They always knew how to brighten my day and make me smile. I'd forget about my problems and issues when I was around them. I loved being around Matthew the most, he always knew how to cheer me up and make me laugh. Lunchtime was running smoothly until...Marianne and Shakia threw lunch at me. The other girls from the clique tagged along and threw their lunches at me. By the time they were done, minus my friends; the kids started laughing at me and pointing fingers. I couldn't fight back the tears anymore; Matthew and the others tried to console me but I ran out as fast as I could to the opposite side of the school building.

Girls Bathroom

I ran into the girl's bathroom in the eighth-grade hallway. I broke down in tears. I looked into the mirror and started to scream and lose it. I started throwing toilet paper and paper towels around the bathroom, I kicked the stalls and hitting the walls until finally, I sunk to the floor. I turned to my purse and took out some ibuprofen for my head. I looked at the pill bottle and poured all the pills in my hand and swallowed them with water. I laid on the floor and looked up at the ceiling, and closed my eyes and didn't open them, waiting for my heart to stop beating.

Many Hours later, I woke up thinking I was in heaven but instead I saw hospital ceiling lights.  Confused and Hurt, I lifted up and was surrounded by my grieving mother, sisters, brother, and my friends.

A/N: Attempting to take my own life, wasn't something I was proud of. Back then, I couldn't take it anymore and to be honest I was hoping to be reunited with my father but GOD had other plans. As of today, I was glad and thankful to be alive and breathing, I know that God didn't want to leave all my loved ones behind and end my life at a young age. To all kids out there, who are being bullied, suicide is NOT the answer to end bullying. I've learned my lesson and if something has happened and you've had enough...TELL SOMEONE!!!! Do whatever it takes to stop the bullying. Bullies are nothing but cowards who are jealous of you because you're different...the best kind of different; and that's ok. Suicide is not the answer.