I felt better after crying all my sadness out. I think I needed to admit to myself that it was ok to feel that way. As my mom would say, it's still early days- it's not like I'm not happy, it's just that it's been a bit harder to adjust than I thought it would be. I don't know what I was expecting really, I guess I was just super excited at the prospect of such a big change.
I'm not just here for no reason though- my day job is photography, and when the company I work for opened a branch here in London, I jumped at the chance to go. I'm only contracted her for a year, but if I want to I can stay on. Right now I kind of want to go home, but then at other times I'm really glad I'm here. I don't have to worry about that choice now though, right now I can just enjoy myself.
I have a terrible sense of direction, and I haven't ventured out too far yet in case I can't find the way back. But at some point I'm going to have to bite the bullet, so it might as well be today. At least it's sunny, though it is cold. I'm used to blazing sun all year round, and the concept of cold weather, especially snow, fascinates me. It sounds stupid, but it's just something I've genuinely never experienced before.
I'm feeling a bit brighter about it all today, so hopefully it'll be good. I grab my camera and my backpack and head out the door. It's weird how different the same sort of thing can be- the block I lived in at home looked really similar, but this has a totally different feel. Maybe it's because Americans are generally very friendly and chatty, whereas British people seem to keep to themselves more. I know they're stereotypes, but I've always found them to be true.
I step out into the cold air, and despite that, the bright sun makes me feel much more settled. I can't just take photos of random people, as interesting as they are, so I'm sticking to buildings and scenery for now. I head down the busy street with my headphones in, feeling almost peaceful for the first time in a while. I'm back to doing what I'm used to, plus I'm kind of shut off from everyone else.
This is a nice area, I'm glad I ended up here rather than somewhere that feels dangerous. I got really lucky with that one, especially since I knew almost nothing about England before I came here. I'm not heading anywhere in particular, just seeing where my feet instinctively take me. Soon enough, I end up at a park which seems oddly out of place in a busy city. I get my camera out and start taking some pictures, feeling relaxed for once.
I feel a lot happier now I'm slightly more used to the area, and it feels like time's gone quickly, as after a few hours of exploring, it's starting to get dark. I don't want to be wandering around a still fairly unknown city at night. Thankfully I can remember the way back, though at some point I'm going to need someone to explain the tube to me as that would be much easier.
Finally my block comes into sight, and I'm glad to be almost there. It hasn't been a particularly long day, but I've got a lot done and am feeling a lot better about the whole thing. As I walk up the stairs, I quite literally bump into Tristan, just like I did when I first met him. "Sorry." I apologise. He gives me a small smile, but he looks kind of sad- I would know, I've had to do that before. "Are you ok?" I ask.
He nods. "Yeah. I'm fine." He doesn't look it, but I guess it's not my place to press it.
He walks down past me, then I'm suddenly reminded of something I meant to ask him. "Wait, can you do me a favour?"
He turns around. "Depends on what it is."
I try to think of how to word it without sounding really rude, especially as I don't think he's feeling great. Eventually I say "My mom was nagging me about whether I was safe, and she wanted to make sure I had some backup in case my heating breaks or I get lost or something."
Tristan laughs, and I'm glad as he looked sad earlier.. "Don't remind me, my mum is exactly the same."
I smile. "Can I use you for that then? You know, just to get her off my back."
"Yeah, sure." he says, and I'm glad he agreed. We swap phones and put in our numbers.
"Thank you." I say, genuinely meaning it.
He smiles, though the slightly sad look is back again. "That's ok." As he goes downstairs, I can't help feeling that something's up. I don't even know him that well, so I don't know why I'm thinking about it so much- I just don't like seeing people sad. Sadly, there's not much I can do. I just hope he feels better, I know only too well what it's like being sad with no one to help.
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If this was shit it's because I wrote it in like 30 minutes 😂 Oops. Please still vote and comment though!
STAI LEGGENDO
He's American (Trames au)
Fanfiction"I love your accent, it's so cute." "You're going to have to get used to it, we all talk like this here." Or, where Tristan has his heart broken, and the only thing that heals it is the sunny American who moves in upstairs. *vaguely based off she's...
