growing wings | Completed

09. drown above ground

    i am a mountain, my peak is high above the skies, and i feel as though i am flying with the birds,

     however, i am stuck. stuck in one place. rooted stuck to the ground.

    i am unable to move, the fear bubbling in my mouth is unable to form words,

     anxiety is my best friend, and i believe my mind will carve a deeper wound.

    my high peak crumbles to the ground, i grow smaller, and my heartbeat thunders to the beat of the rain,

     will i drown above ground?

    i wish all of my nightmares would curl up into a ball and disintegrate, they are the cause of my crippling migraine,

     this rain is carving paths onto my face and dripping from my clothes as though they are finally done with my battleground.

     even with the rain curling above my brow, dropping to my lashes and unto the floor,

     i can see her clearly.

     hot tears blend in with the cold, harsh rain and i taste the salt in my mouth, it's as familiar as blood, i do not say anything, my lips restricting my prisoner of war.

     i don't remember missing her this severely.

    i feel fingers clench my fearful heart, and a wave of heat wash over me,

    recognition flares in her pulchritudinous eyes, a cordial smile appears on her vibrant face.

    she needs to get out of my mind, doesn't she?

    there's a war taking place in my headspace.

     "ezra," her voice is like a thousand fireflies lighting up the night sky,

     my throat is choking up with words forming in a ball, and i can't seem to say anything.

     i don't think i knew if she was really standing in front of me, or if it was my sanity chipping away nearby,

      either way, i followed her eyes form a path down my face, they settled on my lip ring.

     "you got a piercing?" she had asked, eyebrow quirked up and a warm, inviting grin,

     "yeah, a while ago," i don't think she could tell whether it was the rain or my tears that were painting my face.

     "it's been a long time, huh?"  i simply nodded, it really had been.

     and at that moment, i knew i could no longer tell reality from fantasy.

     that was until she hesitantly touched my shoulder,

     "it was nice seeing you again, i'll see you around?"

     again, i can only nod because to see her was like seeing new colours,

     she left after that, and i closed my eyes, feeling as though i had been crowned.

     - drown above ground