The Long Game--Joshaya

Chapter 18

It was our little secret. Nobody knows about it yet. Okay its only been a day, but it's hard to believe that neither of us have told anyone yet.

I was scared about what they were going to say. Back then they kept telling us that it was inappropriate. They kept telling us that it was wrong, that it was impossible. What if they say that now?

I wasn't 18 yet, what if this is wrong? No. I can't doubt myself. I looked at the text message I had gotten early this morning. A text from Josh saying a simple "good morning". Yup, we were going to be one of those couples. As much as I would love to hate it, I secretly liked it. It was so cliche which was gross, but cliches were cliches for a reason. Everyone likes them to a certain extent.

I quickly texted him back. And started getting ready. I quickly drove to Riley's place to pick her up.

"Why are you so smiley?" Riley asked as she bounced into the car.

"What do you mean? I'm always this happy."

"No no no. You're always 'why am I here. I should ditch' grumpy Maya."

"I just woke up in a good mood today"

I knew Riley didn't believe me because I didn't believe me. She shrugged it off anyways.

"How are you and your boo?" I asked her. As much as my love life was progressing, I needed to keep up with Riley's too.

"We're doing great. I absolutely like this guy Maya. He accepts my bubbliness and my goofiness. He doesn't look at me the way.."

"Lucas did sometimes". I finished for her. I took one hand off the wheel to grab her hand.

"I'm glad for you Riles. You're great the way you are and I'm glad someone can see it. Well other than your number one:me".

She shot a smile at me. "You're my number one too."

"How are you and Josh by the way?" I tried my hardest to hold back a smile.

"We're good. We've been doing the same"

"That's good. And how are you though Maya?"

I was so over the moon about Josh that for a second I managed to forget my nightmares and my fears. For one night I had forgotten everything and thought I was a normal girl.

I wanted that feeling to last forever. I know that's just wishful thinking though. The nightmares will always come back, the fear will always be there. Nothing will ever leave me.

But I'm learning that these things don't have to define me. I can still live on with these fears. Yea it'll be tough but if life wasn't tough then what was it. I've been through enough, I wont let it bring me down.

Gosh I'm starting to sound like Riley.

---

School went by quickly. Nothing interesting really happened. Although, Smackle and Farkle have been MIA for ages. They're probably working on college admissions. Hell, they're probably competing to see who's get into the best college.

College huh?

I had an idea of where I wanted to apply. One option being NYU of course. There were my back ups like going to a closer college that I was sure I'd get into. I also wanted to try and seeing if I could get into a University of California. I needed to research on that. And then there was that..

I haven't been thinking about it in the past year because of everything that happened. Every time I tried to pick up a pencil or a brush of some sort, my mind always wandered back to that night. I was scared of it. I knew it was because I wanted to lay it all out but it was hard on me.

That time during home coming, I was excited because I thought that maybe I could finally get passed it. And surprisingly I did. I had Josh there with me though. He pulled me out of that hiccup in a way. The colors and images still scared me but I can't just be stuck forever. Art was a part of me, and that's why it kept reminding me of my past.

The more I thought about art and college, the more I felt motivated. I started to head to an arts store since most of my supplies we're dried out from not being used. I wasn't sure if I would be going to an art school or even applying but I could at least leisurely draw right? I hope.

----

"Maya!!!" Riley yelled from the first floor. I was on the third floor so it wasn't too far, but that sure disturbed the rest of the neighbors.

"Riley? What are you doing?" I screamed back. I guess neither of us cared that it was 10 at night and surely some people would be upset at our volume.

"Do I have some news for you!!" She jumped all happy. She was always happy though.

"Then come up here and tell me!" She immediately ran off into the building and soon enough she was at my door.

I still left all the lights on, so I could see the shadows of Riley right at my door. I opened it and right away Riley came bouncing.

"We are officially" she came singing in. She spun a few times too.

"Really? This is great Riley!"

"Isn't it?" She grabbed my hand and started jumping up and down. Unfortunately for Riley I did not do that.

"So when do I get to meet him?"

"Well my good friend, I hope you're free this Saturday. We're going on a double date!"

My smile dropped a little. Date?

"I know you have uncle Josh but I just didn't want you to third wheel. I also don't want uncle Josh to meet him yet because I want you to tell me first what you think of him. So my now boyfriend said that he would invite his brother to go on the date. Don't worry, it's just a strictly friends thing."

His brother? Isn't that weird?

"And him and his brother are best friends. They're like twins so it's not too weird. Fraternal by the way."

I sighed. She looked me in the eyes with her puppy eyes. "Please tell me you'll agree. I'll be with you the whole time."

I gave a bigger sigh and small smile, "fine."

"YES! I'M SO EXCITED" she hopped around.

I guess I'm going to have to tell Josh about this and hope he's okay with it. I wonder what Riley's boyfriend is like.