The Time Lord's Angel [1] // Doctor who

A New Perspective on Life

It was weird waking up to a bright white room after what had happened and my initial thoughts were I was dead but when I look around and find I'm in a weird medical room I assume that I'm not, because if this is what the afterlife is like, then it's bloody boring and I want out. As I start to pay more attention to my surroundings I find that I'm in some kind of incubator thing and conclude that I'm definitely not dead. I look around and see two familiar faces looking down at me, both with extremely relieved looks. There was something different about them though, something that made them seem new and unknown to me and for some reason I couldn't quite place the ginger's name. All I knew was my mind was aching with a newfound knowledge that confused me, my mind felt to be working twice as fast as usual as I try to work out all the possible scenarios that lead me to this steel table, that by the feel of it wasn't actually steel, it wasn't a metal from this planet but it's close enough. I quickly find myself questioning why I know what steel feels like against my back, confusing myself over why on earth I was even thinking about the metal under my body rather than why I was lying on a table. Looking back to the two faces I start to sit up, wanting answers; as soon as I do, I'm embraced by the ginger tightly, a kind and loving sisterly hug and suddenly her name comes back to me and I marvel over the fact that I could forget my own sister's name. I groan slightly as my body begins to ache in Amy's hold. "Amy, be careful, she's still regaining her strength." The Doctor warns Amy as she lets me go, allowing me to lay down gently leaning my head against the soft pillow. I close my eyes for a minute as the other two speak quietly, when I open my eyes again they lock with Amy and as I do yet more memories come flocking in, our past together, the people she'd met, the man she'd fallen in love with that I couldn't help but grow more and more curious about his whereabouts.

"What happened?" I ask tiredly. There's a very sudden silence between Amy and the Doctor, one which means it's going to be very possible that I won't like the information they're obviously withholding. I look between the two of them expectantly awaiting their answers. "Guys, seriously, what happened?" I ask desperately, suddenly worried and scared.
"Kenz, just before we tell you this, you have to know, you were going to die, you'd lost over half of your blood, we had no other option but to do what we did." Amy tells me hastily.
"I don't care why you did it, what did you do, that's what I want to know." I reply, getting flushed and worried, knowing something has changed, majorly. There was another silence and whilst Amy looks at me guiltily, the Doctor was completely avoiding my gaze, leading to me targeting him. "Doctor, what happened?" My voice cracking slightly.
"You didn't have enough blood in your body to keep you alive, so we had to do a blood transfusion, the only problem was we don't have any of your blood type in the TARDIS, we had to give you my blood to keep you breathing." He explains, barely even glancing at me.
"So what does that mean?" I ask, after pondering what I'd been told.
"It means you're not human anymore, Mackenzie. You've been in a coma for the past two months, because your body's been rebuilding itself so that it can handle the energy needed to withhold the life of a Time Lord." The Doctor tells me, seeming as if he's trying to hold back all emotion, but I can hear the occasional yet well hidden breaks in his voice as he informs me of the drastic changes in my life.
"So I'm a Time Lord?"
"Yes."
"Look, Kenz, I'm so sorry, it was my decision and I couldn't lose you, you're my rock, you're my sister, my best friend and I'm so sorry, but I couldn't lose you." Amy starts to cry, letting the emotions of the past two months catch up with her.
"I just need some time to think." I say eventually, not really listening to Amy, as the information whirls around in my head information now going in one ear and out the other.
"I'll take you to your room, ok?" The Doctor offers and I nod as I'm helped off of the cold table and towards my room.

"I wouldn't try to sleep, it won't be easy, Time Lord's don't need sleep, you just need to relax and let yourself rebuild your energy." The Doctor says as he helps me into my bed..
"You never sleep?" I ask looking to him.
"Rarely." He says.
We watch each other for a long moment until the Doctor clears his throat and walks to the doorway, he turns off the light and begins to close the door but I suddenly just want to know more about everything.
"Wait, Doctor, can you stay?" I call out to him. He begins to open the door and looks in, seeming as if he wants to refuse, but he seems to give in and walks in turning on the side light and walks over to my bed and perches on the edge, not sure of what he should do. "Can you tell me more about it?" I ask him.
"Are you sure, I mean maybe you should just try to not think about it for now." He starts to protest.
"Doctor, please, I don't want to be pitied, I'm not cross about the whole blood transfusion, I'm not even upset, Doctor, it's just a lot of information to take in, and I just want to understand it. So please, explain." I plead, not wanting to be treated differently.
And so he began to explain everything about the life of a Time Lord, all the changes I will experience, he also told me about his experiences, everything that he did, all that he's lost. Despite all the negative information I was given, I couldn't help but look forward to a lot of it, one of those things being the possibility of spending the rest of my time with the Doctor.

"I'm a Time Lord." I muse after ten minutes of quiet, I look up to the Doctor who was now relaxing on my bed whilst I rested my head against his shoulder. I had enjoyed the silence, but it eventually caught up with me and the idea filled me with joy at the thought as an idea popped up.
"Yeah, you are, it's not necessarily a good thing, Mackenzie." The Doctor tells me dismally. I hesitate as roll around to lean on my arms so I can get a good look at his face as I wonder what he meant.
"What? Why?" I ask.
"I didn't want this for you Mackenzie, I wanted to travel through time with you for a few years, and then I wanted you to move on, I wanted you to meet someone who would be good for you, I wanted you to choose your human life over a life with me. I don't want you to lose as much as I have, I've lost so much, I can't let you lose anyone." He opens up a little.
"Well, you know what I want, Doc?" I ask him and he rolls his eyes, a little smile lighting up his face. "Ever since I was a little girl, I dreamed of a raggedly dressed man wishing for him to land his big blue box in my garden and take me and sister away from a life that I'd grown to really hate. All my life I've just wanted this man to take me away, show me what is out there in the universe. Well that man came back: you came back, Doctor, and I don't want you to leave again, ever again." I tell him, tears brimming my eyes as I look deep into his eyes.
"I'm not good for you, Mackenzie; there's someone else out there for you who would give you a better life, and I took that away from you, I took that away from you as soon as I came back." He replies, and I shake my head slowly throughout his reply.
"I don't want anyone else, Doc, I want this life, I love this life. I want you, Doctor, I want the life you and this big blue box will give me. I don't want someone who would be good for me, you're good for me, you make me smarter and braver, I haven't had any attacks in ages, you make me better."
"You haven't had any attacks in ages, because you've been in a coma the past few months Kenz, I put you in that coma!" His voice raises as he gets more emotional.
"No, you saved me, you let me live." I try to stay calm as my voice wavers.
"I ruined your life, Mackenzie. I made you something you never should have been."
"You gave me the chance to be with you, and that's all I want, because like it or not, I'm pretty sure I'm falling in love with you!" I shout finally, the silence in the room was thick enough to cut straight through. He watches me closely, looking from eye to eye.
"I know." He whispers finally looking defeated. "That's what I regret the most." My breathing hitches at his final sentence. "Because I'm not good enough for you, I'll ruin you."
"Well, I don't think you will, I don't regret it, you said that kiss meant something to you, so if it still means something to you, kiss me now, if you don't feel anything for me, I'll give up, I'll go home and live that life you so want me to live, and I'll accept this so called mistake of letting me become a Time Lord." I stare him straight in the eye, hoping this will make rather than break us. He thinks deeply, and I start to feel my heart deflate as the thought of the Doctor not feeling the same pops into my head. Just as the doubt suddenly seems as if it's reality the Doctor brings my lips to his. It's slow a sweet and makes my insides twist joyfully, dancing at the idea of the Doctor kissing me. I pull away eventually and smile widely at him before I lie my head against his chest, listening to the sound of his two heartbeats. "So do you still want me to leave and go live a 'better' life?" I ask calmly wrapping my arm around his torso, relaxing. He chuckles lightly as he places his arm around my waist.
"I'll be honest, I would much rather you stay, but I'm not convinced it's the best life for you." He sighs lying back too, getting a little more comfortable.
"If I'm with you, I'll be happy. Plus it's my life, I do what I want." I tell him. He doesn't reply, and I take his silence as a win as I close my eyes, peaceful and calm enjoying the Doctor's presence.