Raindrops | Poetry

i'm sorry

I'm sorry I was never enough. I'm sorry I couldn't love the way you deserved to be. I'm sorry I couldn't understand the turmoil in your mind. I'm sorry I couldn't get it right, no matter how hard I tried. I'm sorry to let you into my life just to make you see the monster I am. I let you call me Rose, but I'm sorry I didn't warn you of my thorns. They tore your skin and flesh when you tried to make love to me. I'm sorry I keep on overthinking, overreacting, overeating and just doing things more than they should be done. I'm sorry for saying so many sorry's. I'm sorry for everything.

Record this and keep it safe. Play this on my funeral, so that people know that being an album of untuned apologies, unsaid apologies and sighs gulped down as stones does no good; some day the burden of their apologies will be too heavy over their lungs to let any air of Life enter. Then they'll die, and people except those who are close won't remember them for long. They're no heroes to say the magic word they taught you in kindergarten -- sorry . . .

The tape goes silent. Indeed her funeral just had people she was close to. No one else... No one else...