Venus Eaton is desperate to escape the abuse of her previous faction although she is unaware and unprepared of the ordeals of Dauntless initiation. She is a stranger to her own brother until he accuses her of murdering their mother, and finds out th...
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VENUS
MY BROTHER. My brother, who was meant to protect me but instead he left me and accused me of something I didn't do.
"Tobias?" My voice is nothing but a croak, and I taste something vile in my throat, but I know it isn't the alcohol. His gaze flicks down to his boots and back up to my eyes. I purse my lips.
Anger flares inside me and I raise the back of my hand, bringing it against his cheek. His head swings to the side and my hand falls. Tears fill my eyes and I watch as one side of his face turns red. My hand stings.
"I hate you." Turning, I step away but Eric grabs my arm. I forgot he was there but I yank my arm away with a feeble hiss. "Leave me the fuck alone!" I snap, quickening my pace. I am no longer feel like I'm walking on stilts. I am perfectly sober, my racing heart thunders against my ears and my clammy palms tremble.
I was suspicious it was Four, that he was my brother, but I didn't tell anyone. I didn't even tell myself. I told myself I was wrong when I have been right all along. Why didn't I see the similarities? The short Abnegation hair, the dark eyes. Maybe it's his height, I think as I reach the chasm. My eyes scan the railings, I hear the crash of water against the rocks. I breathe evenly through my nose. I used to be as tall as him, but now I'm smaller than him.
Maybe it's his voice. My fingertips rest on the railings, the cold metal seeping through my skin. I look down into the blackness, and a sob burns in the back of my throat. His voice used to be small and high-pitched, now it's low and husky with maturity.
Maybe it's his tattoos. I let out the sob that has been waiting to escape my lips, covering my face with my hands. It's the first time I've cried since Abnegation, but even thinking of my old faction makes me disgusted. The tattoos crawling up his neck, his shirt hiding the artwork on his skin. Dauntless have tattoos, which is why I thought it could never be him, but why not? My stupid brain changed every positive into a negative, and now my mind is misty.
And what the fuck was I doing? What the fuck was I thinking? Kissing Eric at his girlfriend's funeral, what sort of girl am I?
No. He kissed me, didn't he? No. I can't blame him for starting something - I went with it, I kissed him back... I'm in the wrong, too. It was a foolish thing to do.
But I kissed the intimidating Dauntless leader! I actually kissed him. If I told Harmonie, she'd never believe me so she doesn't need to know.
I stop myself from thinking about it. There goes my mind again, changing all the positives into negatives. He was drunk, I was drunk. We were at his dead girlfriend's funeral, the same day she died and that makes me feel disgusted about myself, it makes me feel awful and I want to apologize to her but she's gone so there's nothing I can say.
I take a slow breath and wipe my eyes with the back of my hand. Turning away from the dark chasm, I gradually wander my way back to the dormitories. The one thing I need is rest, to shake off whatever alcohol is left in my body. I know it won't erase the events of tonight, but it'll make me forget about them for a few hours, and that's enough.
When I open the dormitory door, Lucy quickly sits up and looks at me. She doesn't look as if she's gotten any sleep yet, and she smiles lightly at me.
I ignore her, dragging my heavy body to my bed and flopping down on it. It doesn't take a moment for my mind to shut down, and when it does, I am thankful.
