Venus Eaton is desperate to escape the abuse of her previous faction although she is unaware and unprepared of the ordeals of Dauntless initiation. She is a stranger to her own brother until he accuses her of murdering their mother, and finds out th...
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VENUS
THERE IS an ugly second between the gun going off and the pain. It is the second everything flashes before you - and you're focused on the eyes of the man who shot you.
How, they used to be so blue...
And then the pain starts. Somewhere below my shoulder, all I feel is pain. It attacks me in harsh jabs, and I feel myself slipping, and slipping and falling...
Blood fills my mouth, but with every cough, I'm ripped apart like tissue paper. When my eyes flick down, I see a dark circle of blood near the collar of the shirt - spreading and growing, until a puddle has collected to my side. My arm drops into it, staining my skin. My white hair is now blood-splotchy and spread over my wet face.
And my vision is tunneling. Eric gets up. I don't know if he is still under the simulation - he just leaves. It feels like everything is breaking apart.
It feels like I'm drowning. I wish I could see the stars, instead of an ugly white wired ceiling. I feel woozy, and I can't move.
My entire body is numb. My head is packed with clouds. I try to lift my arm. It is sticky, with the blood. My head falls to the side. Blood stretches out in scarlet talons around me. Sweat cools in the dip of my back. I can't even cry. I want to.
A door opens. I hope it is Tris or my brother. I hope he's awake. I hope he hasn't hurt Tris. He isn't like that. Neither is Eric. I guess my love wasn't enough, wasn't enough to wake him from the sim...
A voice sounds. It is sweet and reminds me of dandelions and sunflowers, warmth and fields and it's comforting, surrounded in a pool of my own blood.
Emily appears over me. She has tears in her eyes. I want to tell her not to cry, but my lips won't move. She strokes my hair, moving it away from my face.
I see Peter. His face is drained of color as he looks down at me. His lips are pulled down into a frown. Does he look sad? He looks sad to me. He looks dazed and miserable.
"Venus!" Emily's voice is shrill. She tries to tilt my head up. Blood spills from my mouth, but I don't have enough strength to cough it all up. My head rolls back as soon as she lets go. I feel pressure over the wound. Warm blood continues to spill. "Caleb... Caleb is going to help you, okay?"
Emily sounds desperate. "Just hang on, hang on for me, pleas-" She cuts off with a heavy sob, and I try to keep my eyes open. "Peter, carry her! Get her out of here, quickly!"
It feels like I'm lifted and the lights get closer. In fact, the lights are fucking blinding. I squint, and my eyes slip closed even more.
No, no, no. I don't want to die yet.
"Emily-" I try to get out. My throat is hoarse and thick with blood. I want to cry. I can't.
We're running. Peter is, at least. Voices get closer and the room gets dim. Blue lights flash past every few seconds, I hear Emily's choking sobs. "Hold on!" Someone says, but I'm drowning.
They'll have to let me go. I don't want to go.
Why do I have to go?
I hear a deep voice, and hardly realize it's my father because he isn't shouting. He isn't shouting, for the first time, he isn't angry at me. It's the thing I've wanted since I can remember - the chiding concern of a father.
It's worth dying for.
Maybe it's worth dying for.
I smell antiseptic. I remember back in Abnegation, and the knife Emily used to get out the bullet. Does that have to happen again?
I don't think I'm strong enough.
I feel more deadly pain. I see black splotches in my vision, appearing and disappearing and making me dizzy.
I try to think of all the good things I've done to get here.
The bad things? So many, but I can't change them.
I don't have time. My body is a clock, and it's nearly midnight. It's time to go home. There is
