Falling Slowly | Luke Hemmings

sixteen

I sit here at this empty wooden table in the library wondering: why can't I do this? Why is this way easier for other people? I didn't get home until late last night because I had an extra shift at work, so I'm sitting here working on last minute calc homework. This doesn't make any sense to me, no matter how hard I try to figure it out. It's only the beginning of the fucking year and I've already failed almost every quiz and test I've taken in this class.

"Scarlet, are you alright?" Luke asks, sitting down in the chair next to me. We did this everyday, I would get here early, and Luke would come help me with calc. He didn't look like he minded helping me, but I was glad he did. After what he told me about trying to pay more attention in class, I realized that I actually should. This is the only class that I really need to pass before graduating at the end of the year. I promised myself I was going to catch up, and not be behind in this class anymore, and hopefully I could.

"No," I answered him honestly. He pushes his chair a little closer to me, trying to look and see what was on my paper. He wore his all black as usual, but this time with a long sleeve shirt since it was starting to get cold outside. He wore a beanie, with his hair sticking out in the front, which looked adorable on him. 

"What's wrong?" He asked me, looking interested in what I had to say. I was glad Luke was here to talk to me, since I really didn't have anyone else to talk to at the moment. 

"I just can't do this," I tell Luke, putting my head down in the palm of my hands. I lean forward on the desk, covering my entire face. I didn't know why Luke was being so nice to me, but I was so glad that he was.

"Yes you can," He answered, putting a hand on my back to comfort me.

"It's just so hard," I say truthfully. I was probably the only one in my entire class that thinks this is hard, and I hate it. It makes me feel embarrassed, and more left out. "I finally started to pay more attention after you told me," I laughed looking in Luke's direction. 

"Good," He laughed along with me, leaning on his elbows that are placed over the table.

We sit in silence for a while, side by side as I continue to finish my last minute homework assignment. Luke would look over to make sure I was doing alright, and checking over my problems every now and then. I understood most of this lesson, thanks to Luke who told me to start paying more attention and made me realize that this is my final year, and that I need to pass.

"Hey," Luke said, interrupting my thoughts as I looked towards him. "Want to start walking over to class? The bell is going to ring any minute," he finished, grabbing his book and starting to stand up.

"Already?" I groaned, putting all my papers in my bag. I got up and followed Luke out of the library and into the hallways of classrooms.

We stopped at Luke's locker along the way, grabbing his books that he needed for our next class. We finally got to our calc class, and took our seats next to each other towards the back of the class.

I looked over at Luke to see he already had all his materials out for the class, and was already starting the warm up that was written on the board.

I stared at the board for minutes, before finally giving up and setting my pencil down next to my empty paper.

-

"Alright class," my calculus teacher went on as he stood in front of the classroom. "You will be having a quiz tomorrow on lessons 2-7 through 2-9. We will have a warm up that reviews the lessons, then go right into the quiz," he finishes, writing out all of our homework on the board.

I groaned, placing my head in my palms. This was the last thing I needed right now, and it was just only going to make my grade lower.

The final bell of the day rang moments later, and I packed up all my stuff to get the hell out of here.