Guard up, Oscar Diaz

ELEVEN

PART ELEVEN

I will love you,
not starting with your skin
or your organs
or your bones
I will love you madly first,
your naked soul.
— Christopher Poindexter

Ξ GU,OD Ξ

I laid on the couch. After watching all the toys story movies with Rico and Oscar last night, I was beyond exhausted. I was about to fall asleep, when the bell rang. "Monse!" After calling her for what seemed like a thousand times she finally opened the door. "Ah!" Her yelp made me jump off the couch to see what was going on. Monse held her hand over her eye. "This psycho bitch just punched me!" She shouted.

A black haired Latina stood before me. "Who the fuck are you!?" I yelled. She stepped forwards, ready to strike. I swung my arm back and smashed my fist against her nose. "Puta madre!" She mumbled. She grabbed my hair, pulling me down and brought her knee up to my face. I scratched her, causing her to pull harder. I saw Monse punch her in her jaw out of the corner of my eye. I managed to free myself and wanted to swing again until she stepped back. "That'll teach you to stay away from my man, puta!" She shouted before running off.

"You okay?" I asked Monse as I placed the ice pack on her right eye. "I'm okay. It hurts a bit but I'll manage.. are you okay? Your lip and eyebrow is busted and you have a few scratches on your face." I nodded and smiled. "I'm okay. Don't worry about it." "Sin?" She queried with a shaky breath. "Yes?" She sighed before parting her lips to speak. "I'm sorry about all the things I said. I didn't mean it." I placed a kiss on her temple. "I know you are. I forgave you even before you knew you were in the wrong." She smiled and gave me a tight hug.

✞

"So about Monse.. you two dating?" I asked Cesar as I took a puff from the cigarette in between my fingers. "I actually don't know. She doesn't want to make it official."

"But do you though?" I questioned. He thought about it for a second then shrugged. "I think so.. I don't know."

"What about you and Sin, though?" He queried with a smirk staining his lips. I chuckled. "What about me and Sin?" He raised up an eyebrow. "Jamal said that you two almost kissed. I guess Spooky had finally found himself a hyna." I shook my head. "Nah.."

Cesar looked off into the distance. "What's with Flaco?" He asked. I turned my head around and saw her walking towards our house. She wiped the blood from her nose with her sleeve making it run out of her nose again. "What happened to you?" I queried, confused. She kissed her teeth. "Don't worry 'bout it." She retorted before walking away. I grabbed her wrist, turning her around and stepped closer to her. "Who did this to you, Flaco?" Though I had no feelings for her, she was family and nobody messed with my family and got away with it. She kept silent. I shot her a stern look, making her part her lips to speak.

"Your new ruca, Sin." She spoke in fury. I tossed my cigarette on the ground. "Why would she do this to you?"

"That puta is crazy, that's why! She probably heard about me and got intimidated." I clenched my jaw and turned to Cesar. "Stay here, okay?" He nodded.

I walked over to her house. I pounced on the door. Seconds later, the door swung open. Monse stood in the doorway. Her eye was slightly blue. Maybe her and Sin jumped Diana. Wouldn't surprise me that they stooped that low. "S-Spooky?" She stuttered. She was clearly afraid of me, not that I cared. "Where's your sister?" She sighed and opened the door further. "She's in her room."

I stormed into her room. She sat on the edge of her bed with her back towards me while resting an ice pack on her brow bone. "What the fuck did you do?" I hissed. She turned around. As soon as my eyes laid upon her injuries, my attitude disappeared. I sat beside her, feeling ashamed that I believed Flaco over her. "I suppose she told you that I started it.. she's lying, Oscar." She tiredly explained. I nodded. "I know now." I carefully took her hand in mine, afraid that she would pull her hand away. Instead, she held on tight and gave me a little squeeze.

I felt butterflies rushing through my stomach. It was that or, common sense leaving my body but I was willing to risk it all at this certain point. I leaned in closer, closing the gap between us. Our lips touched each other softly. "Sin.. if you don't stop," he whispered. "I'm not gonna be able to.." he trailed off. "To what, Oscar?" He sighed. "Fuck this."

He smashed his soft lips onto mine. His hands trailed down to my waist. He pulled me on top of him. I rested one hand on his chest while the other one was wrapped around his neck. I couldn't help but smile in between the kiss. He pulled back before it would lead to more. He placed gentle kisses on my jaw and cheek. He glanced at the cut on my lip and placed a kiss on it. "Te odio. (I hate you)" he whispered. I frowned. "Why?" I questioned.

"You're making me feel like a perdedor. (loser) You're making me soft and I can't have that." I sat up straight and locked my eyes with his. "Why do you think that love makes you weak?!" "Because it does." He retorted. "So you don't love Cesar?" I whisper-yelled in frustration.

"I have love for him. He's my family. You aren't." I sighed and ran my hands through my hair. "Love is so strong. I'm sorry that no one was there to show you that, Oscar, but love doesn't make you a loser." He stood up. "We shouldn't be doing this. It doesn't make sense." I stood up as well. "What doesn't make sense?" I questioned tiredly. He sighed and kept quiet. "What doesn't make sense, Oscar?!"

"Us, Sin! We don't make sense together. We should part our ways.. It's for the better."

He exited the room, leaving me alone. The room that was first filled with warmth and his scent.. was now gone. Tears began to well up in my eyes. I knew that he would hurt me at some point but I didn't want to admit it. I didn't want to admit that he was maybe just using me. Using me for my company because he didn't want to be alone.

I knew that all but I yet felt like I was addicted to his presence. I was unconsciously trying to break his guards but maybe.. they were built just too high.