Chapter 24 ⸸ Lucifer Loves Me

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AFTER SPENDING the majority of the twenty dollars on mint ice cream, I realized I hadn’t invested in a spoon. I quickly run back into the store to look for a spoon under three dollars. I jump slightly when my phone rings in my pocket.

“Hello?” I ask quickly as I walk down the utensils aisle.

“Rowan?” I hear Sam ask on the other line.

“Sam! Hey!” I say enthusiastically.

“Are you okay?” He asks me.

I nod and then realize he can’t see me. “Uh- yeah! A bit out of breath because I just bought a bunch of ice cream and no spoon so now I have to find and purchase a spoon before all my ice cream melts-”

“You’re rambling.”

I sigh. “Cas is most likely going to die tomorrow morning. He is summoning the archangel that killed him and the angel will probably just kill him again.” I rant. I smile and feel victorious as I see a pack of baby spoons for $1.50. “Mission accomplished; I’ve got spoons.”

“Spoons plural? Is Dean with you?” Sam asks me.

“No- uh…He’s out trying to get Cas laid.” I say bluntly as I speed walk to a cash register.

“Wait…what?” Sam asks.

“You heard me. I think they’re at a strip club but I really don’t want to know.” I say. When I get the spoons on the belt, the cashier gives me a funny look. In response I hold up the already purchased ice cream in the bag. “No spoons.” I whisper to her. She nods and scans the colourful baby spoons.

“What?” Sam asks.

“Nothing.” I answer.

“And you’re jealous?” Sam asks.

“Of the baby spoons?”

“No, of Cas…” He says slowly.

“That’ll be $1.80.” The cashier says. I hand her the rest of my change.

“Keep the change.” I tell her before grabbing the spoons and leaving the store. “I don’t know what to say Sam. Am I jealous? I don’t know. And it doesn’t really matter because he’s going to be murdered and they don’t even want me showing up. I don’t have time to be jealous.”

“But you do have time to eat ice cream.” He says.

“Yes.” I say, clarifying my standing in the pressing situation. “Cas is getting laid, Dean is likely not far behind that and I am going to eat five tubs of mint ice cream without a care in the world.”

“Why did you buy five tubs?” Sam asks laughing.

“Don’t laugh at me! I’m a stressed, depressed, anxious, slightly delusional, very jealous Lucifer present.” I joke.

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