at the edge of the cliff || ✔

chapter twenty-one: realization

at the edge of the cliff

chapter twenty one: realization

The doorbell rings and I look at Ryder. He looks up from his phone and sighs. He gets up from the couch and goes to the door. I go back to the random movie we were watching.

"What are you doing here?" I hear Ryder ask whoever is at the door.

"Just came to see Shay." a deep, familiar voice says. I slowly stand up and walk to where they are standing. I cross my arms over my chest, leaning against the wall.

"What are you doing here?" I ask repeating Ryder's question from just a few moments before. Grayson scratches his neck awkwardly and shrugs.

"I figured we could head downtown a little earlier." he says.

"Downtown?" Ryder says turning to me with an eyebrow raised. I wave him off.

"We're going to Inside Outsiders to work on some project with some annoying ass chick." I say heading toward the stairs. "Be down in a minute." I run up the stairs. I have been dreading this since we decided to go. Sara is annoying as hell and Grayson is only a tiny step up. I throw a random hoodie over my shirt and slip on some vans. I jog back downstairs and whatever the two guys were talking about stopped as soon as they heard me coming. I stand in the middle of the two tall guys, looking up at both of them.

They look suspicious.

"Come on." I roll my eyes grabbing Grayson's shirt and pulling him to the door. "Bye Ryder." I shout before the door is shut. "Why are you really early?" I question. We both get in his car and start to drive.

"I was bored at home and I thought what better way to spend it than bothering you." he says send me a playful wink. I roll my eyes but couldn't but smile a little. As annoying and jerky as he is, he is a dork. And maybe sometimes I don't mind when he bothers me. We continue driving in silence, until the radio is turned on and a random pop song is playing softly filling up the silence. I glance over at Grayson and his eyes are concentrated on the road, but his face looks different. Different than all of the many goofy grins, smug looks, or crooked smirks. His lips are turned downward in a frown that didn't quite fit his face. I wanted to ask if he was okay, but something told me not to. But have i ever listened to that before? Hell no.

"Hey," I say getting his attention. His eyebrow raises and he glances over to tell me he is listening. "Are...you okay?" i ask.

"Of course. Why would i not be?" he asks looking at me again shooting me a smile. Correction. A fake smile. I am the queen at fake smiles and that is one if i ever seen one.

"Why are you lying to me?" i question watching him as his fists tighten around the steering wheel.

"If I say I'm fine, I'm fine." he says lowly looking directly ahead. "Alright?" he says looking over to me. Usually I would say some snarky comment about him telling me what to do, but this time i just nod. We drive the rest of the time in silence.

"Are you getting out?" i ask standing outside of the passenger door which is still open. I look at Grayson who is just sitting there and staring at the wheel. He doesn't answer. I stand there not knowing what to do. I look around but my head snaps back to him when I hear a sniffle. Is he crying? The longer I look at him, the more he broken he looks. My mind flashes back to when I saw him like that on the cliff.

Sad.

Depressed.

Broken.

And for some reason, my heart hurts seeing him like that.

Hmm, guess I'm not made of coal.

I close the door and walk over to the drivers side. I see a little wet droplet on his jeans above where his head was hanging down.

A tear.

Without thinking, I open the door and stand beside where he is sitting. Another sniffle. I put a hand on his wrist and pull him until he is standing in front of me. He looks me in the eye and i almost started crying with him. "I'm gonna hug you." I state. He opens his mouth but I wrap my arms around his torso. He tenses when we make contact, but then slowly relaxes. His arms pull me closer to him and he puts his head by my neck.

And we stand there hugging on the side of the street.

I don't know what made me do that. I guess he just looked like he needed it.

After about a good two minutes, i pull away gently. I look up at him and he is smiling down at me. "What?" i ask smiling a little myself. He shakes his head and chuckles.

"You're just..." he pauses and his hand intertwines with mine. "Amazing." his voice is deep and his blue eyes pour into mine. A goofy grin stretches across my lips as I roll my eyes.

"Don't go mushy on me, Delgato." I say pulling him behind me as i walk. I hear him chuckle behind me as he walks hand in hand beside me. I feel his eyes on me as we walk to the place we would meet Sara. I look up at him and laugh. "Stop." I try to say seriously but only ended up laughing. A loud squeal comes from my lips when his arms snake around my waist and he picks me up, flipping me over his shoulder. I am once again staring at his ass. I laugh until he sets be back down inside the little cafe.

"Gray?" a voice says from behind us. I immediately recognize it but I guess he had to turn around to know. Kira stands in front of us, arms crossed, and a pissed look on her face. I wanted to laugh but it seemed like the wrong time. "What the hell are you doing with her?" she asks with a disgusted look spread on her features.

"We came here to meet for a project. Why?" Grayson stands up a little taller, and it made Kira shrink a little.

"It didn't seem like just a project." she said slowly eyeing me.

"I don't care how it seems. I just told you what it was." he said rolling his eyes. Kira had a few friends standing behind her and she looked at them with a nervous smile.

"Well I don't really like you hanging out with other girls." she said like he actually cared what she thought. Maybe he did. That thought crossed my mind as they argued. They were technically together, so he had to care about her, right? I wouldn't really peg him for the type to stay with a girl just because. But then again, before I got to kind of know him that's what he was known for. He was that cliche golden player boy everyone loved. Girls and guys. Especially girls, and he loved them too.

"She is a slut. She is always all over you." Kira says loudly bringing me back to the conversation. I look at her then to Grayson.

"Im just gonna...go sit." i say turning to walk away. I hear him say my name and but it stops just at the Sh part. I look back at him and he his froze looking down at the ground. I watch him confused but then i got it.

I guess he realized it too that if he is with her we can't be...friends. "Come on. Are you coming with me?" I heard Kira say. I sat down at a back table and looked over at them.

Our eyes met and I looked down not wanting to see him walk out. But after a few moment I looked back up.

He was gone.