at the edge of the cliff || ✔

chapter forty-one: maturely ignoring

at the edge of the cliff

chapter forty-one: maturely ignoring

Back to hell.

Back to school.

Now this is a place I felt like I hadn't been to in forever.

I pull my hoodie farther over my head, the sleeves over my hands, and focus ahead on getting to class. The people crowding the halls were just background noise as I walk into the half full classroom. Ignoring everyone, I go to my place in the back by the window and sink down into the seat. I swear this place just completely sucks the life out of me. A head of dark messy hair waltzes into the room, a blonde following behind. I take notice of how his hair is messed up, more than usual, as well as Kira's along with her clothes. I suck in a breath as a wave of annoyance crashes over me. Grayson avoids my eyes as he plops into the desk in front of me, Kira thankfully taking a seat near the front with her freinds. Why it bothers me so much, I don't exactly know. Its mostly just the fact that I hate Kira. The blonde annoying jumbo that's has always had it out for me for some reason.

Or maybe it could be because just yesterday he had me wrapped up in his arms while we sat up at the cliff for almost three hours in a comfortable silence just enjoying each others company.

Before I know what I am doing, I find myself reaching out my hand tapping on Graysons shoulder. He doesn't move at first, but a few seconds later he slowly turns around. He keeps his eyes trained somewhere behind me. "Hey?" The simple greeting comes out unsure as I search his face. He won't look at me. "Gray?" I ask hesitantly. He still won't look at me. I feel a stab in my heart. "Did I do something?" I hated asking that I asked that question as soon as it came out of my mouth. It made me sound weak. And I've done too much of that recently.

But it got him to look at me.

"No I-"

"Every one take your seats. Today's the perfect day for a pop quiz!" Mr. Pallet yells obnoxiously loud. Grayson's eyes linger on me for a moment until he turns back around leaving me confused. And kind of hurt.

-

-

-

An hour and a half later, I was trudging the hallway to my next class, which is probably going to be the best one today. This is the only one without Kira, Grayson, Ryder, or Jemma. I'll be alone. It'll be somewhat peaceful than the rest of my day has gone so far. Last class was. . .interesting? I didn't know what was wrong with Grayson, but if he can ignore me I'll ignore him right back.

Mature, I know.

I really don't care.

I'm kind of over all the problems I have in my life. I was so happy yesterday. I was content. I was at some kind of peace. But this morning, all I thought about while getting ready was my mom. While I was walking down the stairs, I walked in to see Wen kissing Ryder's cheek before saying "Have a good day, son." I instantly felt a paing in my chest, not even being able to remember the last time my mom said that to me.

So that just put a damper on my mood at the start of the day.

The what happened with Grayson wasn't any help.

Except my peaceful class didn't go as planned. I kept thinking about him. Why he was mad at me? If he was mad at me? What did I do? What do I do? Should I try and talk to him? Should I just ignore him?

Then I played the different scenarios in my head. Like what could happen if I just ignore him. What could happen if I don't and go try to talk to him.

It was driving me crazy.

But its lunch time, so I'm going to just try and eat. Luckily, as I am walking to the cafeteria, I spot Jemma and Ryder a little ways ahead, so I jog to catch up with them. "Hey." I greet falling in step behind them. Jemma immediately pulls away from Ryder and squashes me in a hug.

"Where have you been? I haven't seen you for ages." I playfully push her off me and laugh.

"It hasn't been that long." She just shakes her head as we walk side by side into the cafeteria. We all sit at our usual table after getting our food, just talking about random stuff. I mostly listened to their little bickering and Jemma laughing at everything Ryder said. I found myself admiring what they had. I've had boyfriends, sure. But nothing serious. Nothing worth mentioning. They had something. Something I'll probably never have.

"Dude, are you even listening?" I blink and Jemma's hand is suddenly waving in my face while the couple both stares at me.

"What? Yes." I say shaking my head, ridding myself of any thoughts swarming my mind.

"What'd I say?" Jem crossed her arms over chest. I sigh and throw my hands up in defense.

"Okay so maybe I wasn't listening." I sigh making them both laugh.

"We were saying how its been a while since we all hung out together." Jemma starts. Its true. Its been so long since I've third wheeled with them.

"And I have a fight in a couple days so I need you there." Ryder says. I smile nodding. Its been a minute since I've been to one of his fights. And maybe I'll see Barry too. Its been ages since ive seen that guy. I miss him.

But what if Grayson is there? Would I talk to him? Would I act as if he isn't there?

"Do you know-" I start asking the question before I realized what I was doing. "if that masked guy is going to fight?" I realize that no one else knows that Grayson is the masked fighter. And I only found out by accident.

"I don't know, why?" Ryder says taking a bite of his burger. I shrug.

"Ooh does Shay have a crush?" Jemma says wiggling her eyebrows. I roll my eyes playfully.

"Maybe." I joke to satisfy her. Ryder snorts.

"She only likes that Grayson fr- guy." He says correcting himself, which I appreciated. This time I roll my eyes for real.

"You guys are so annoying." I comment leaning back in my seat. The bell soon rings and the three of us part ways. Well, I part ways with the two of them. I don't have them in any more classes today. But guess who is in my class? You guessed it right.

Grayson Delgato.

I walked around the corner of the crowded hallway before stopping dead in my tracks. No I didn't see anything. But I do realize something. Grayson is in this class. Do I really want to face him after earlier? Do I really want to torture myself like that.

I spin around on my heel and push my way through the people walking the opposite direction. I think I can afford to miss the rest of the day. After stopping to put my things in my locker, I hop in my car and drive to the cliff, ready for a night full of endless thoughts.