A SINGLE BLUE FLAME ;; T. DABI

issues (4)

"A foster home?"

Touya uttered the words slowly, tasting the bitter flavor of the statement. His voice stirred with venom. Each word expressed in a low, rejecting tone. His expression slowly melted into something dark and disturbed. Aqua eyes narrowing, scarred fists slowly clenching. He was livid.

I felt a tightening force on my shoulders. His fingers clutched on the material of my (f/c) shirt, crinkling the fabric under me and digging his fingers into my stiff shoulders. "Touya" His dark gaze snapped out of its daze. He immediately let go of my shoulders and stepped back. He bit his lip. "I-.." his once deep voice cracked, allowing his weakness to show through. "Sorry" He hushed. I shook my head. "Don't.." I trailed off. I couldn't finish my sentence. The spreading ache in my shoulder reminded me.

Ever since that day Touya was never the same.. he suffered through changes. I honestly thought he was going through some sort of teenage angst at first but I soon discovered it was much more than that.  The sweet and kind boy I knew buried himself under layers of cold words and a short fused attitude. I was able to dig deep enough, picking and clawing my way to his heart. I didn't give up on him. To this day I still struggled to pull him out sometimes. Layers over layers..

My heart ached greatly. The hanging silence in the air was almost palpable. He was enveloped in some sort of shock, searching for my gaze as if to confirm if what I said wasn't a joke or a lie.

After what seemed forever he finally broke the silence. I heaved out a small sigh.
"They're just.. sending you away?" I could feel the disgust in his voice. In a way I couldn't help but agree with his words. I was angry too.

"Yeah.. I didn't bother to hear the rest of it, but I think it'll be in a few months.. after all, the process of finding a foster home and all that stuff takes time.." I replied, the tears bubbling down my cheeks before I wiped them away. At this moment I just wished for the earth to swallow me whole.

Touya just stared at me in disbelief. After all I just told my best friend I was being sent away to god knows where. Where was I even going? What exactly was going to happen to me? Will I be safe? Will I even be happy like they said I would be? The anger inside him was apparent. He was probably holding off to avoid making me feel worse. His arms hung at his sides, clenching his fists to then release. He repeated this, composing himself.

"So they're just going to do that? No questions asked? Your opinion? Your thoughts? They just decided to do it?" His tone raised in a whip of anger, the water tipping over the glass of his heart. A storm preparing to strike at any moment. Waves enveloping me into the dark chaotic ocean that was my possible future. Will they drown me?

I stumbled back from his sudden outburst. Dry leaves crumpled under my feet.I nodded, not knowing how else to reply. My mind ran on a blank line about all of this. I only knew I was definitely angry. Despair, anger, sadness. Those could be some of the words used to describe my stage of being. Yet they weren't. It had all melted and fused into a haze in my mind. I desperately wanted to convince myself none of this was real. Touya slowly reached out a hand and approached it to me. His gaze dwindled with hesitation still fresh from what he had done earlier and because of my delicate state. "It's okay. It was just an accident" His tense posture relaxed as he lifted my chin with his hand. I was forced to look up at him. What I saw broke whatever part of me was still holding together in an instant.

Glass droplets pricked in the corners of his eyes, threatening to spill over. These weren't sorrow tears. They were from anger. His frail arms wrapped around my waist and brought me closer. I could feel his pounding heartbeat against my ears. The racing beat reminded me of drums. One steady beat after the other. A beat, an indication of life. The comforting sound reminded me everything happening around me was very much a reality. It simmered under my skin and ruffled over my worries all at the same time.