26. Confirmation

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Maverick

What mom said broke my heart. She just can't say that! She can't be the reason for my heartbreak! Mahal na mahal ko siya at hindi ko kailangang mamili. Mom means everything to me before Blair. Hindi ko siya kayang saktan. Pero paano niya nakakayang masaktan at mawasak ng ganito 'yong puso ko? I stood by her when dad hurt her! Can't she do the same for me now?

"Mom."

"If you're here to talk about her, please leave,"bungad niya kaagad. Wala pa man akong nasabi.

"Mom, don't do this,"I begged, crying. "I love her, mom."

"Mas mahal mo kaysa sa sarili mong ina?"

"No, mom. You don't have to compare yourself to her. Hindi ko kailangang mamili sa inyo. You're my mother and she's... She's the woman I want to marry, the woman I want to be the mother of my children, of your grandchildren. Mom, dahil kay Blair, nagkaroon ng direksiyon 'yong buhay ko. Dahil sa kanya, nagkaroon ulit ako ng pangarap. Don't take this away from me, please. I can't lose you. I love you, mom. But I can't lose her too."

"I'm sorry,"she whispered, smiling weakly. "But I meant what I said. You will kill me if you marry her. It will break your brother's heart, Third. And when it happens, it will break mine too. This is not how I want to see you and Raven when I left your dad. No, this clearly was not it."

"Mom, please."

"Siguro kapag wala na ako, pwede na. Kapag nakapikit na ako, pwede na. Kapag hindi ko na nakikitang may nasasaktan sa inyo ng dalawa, pwede na. Mahal na mahal ko kayo ng kuya mo, anak,"umiiyak na pahayag ni mommy. "Sobra. Kayo 'yong buhay ko. So Third, do me this little favor please. I want you to forgive your father. And I want you to leave her. Para sa kapatid mo, para sa'kin, please do it."

Umiiyak na iniwan ko si mommy sa kwarto niya. I didn't even give her the chance to embrace me. Bukas na darating ang fiancé ni Blair. Hindi pwede. Hindi ko siya pwedeng layuan. Hindi ko kaya. If I cannot fix this, if I won't choose her, then I am going to lose her for God knows when, might be forever. Her parents and that damn lucky-fiancé of her are going to take her away from me.

Though hesitant, I pressed the doorbell and waited for him to open the door. He didn't disappoint me, like always. He never disappointed me except that one time, when he cheated on mom.

"Son?" gulat na bungad ng magaling kong ama. He even blinked for a few more times as if seeing me in his house is a case of impossibility. "Oh. What's wrong?"tanong niya agad.

He just always knows even when I don't say anything. Hindi na ako sumagot, yumakap lang ako sa kanya at humagulhol sa balikat niya.

"Dad, why does mom have to do this to me? Dad, tulungan mo 'ko oh. Hindi ko kayang mawala sa buhay ko 'yong babaeng mahal ko. Dad..."umiiyak na sumamo ko.

"Halika. Pumasok ka muna sa loob. Tutulungan kita. Gagawin natin lahat, okay?"

Tumango ako. Everything's the same in the house when I last went here which was three years ago. I was only sixteen then. Paanong parang wala lang nagbago? Lahat-lahat, maging 'yong mga lumang gamit namin, nando'n parin.

"Where's Stella?"I asked.

"Stella?"he iterated. "She never lived here, son."

"Why not?"I asked, reliving the anger I had when he cheated on mom.

"She was just a one-time mistake. Maling sinaktan ko 'yong mommy mo. Third, anak, I was just so pained and broken that was why I cheated. But still, it's not an excuse,"aniyang nagpakunot ng noo ko.

"What do you mean?"

"I don't want to tell you this. But your mom filed a divorce even before I cheated,"kwento niyang naluluha kaya napakuyom ako ng palad. "Your mom was sick. She doesn't want me to tell you and your brother. Of course, I disagreed. How can I ever lie to you, son?"

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