There's Always Tomorrow (Prequel to BWYDT)

Chapter 17

A/N: As I mentioned before, the time jumps are going to start to get bigger and Camila's appearances are going to start to get more and more involved.

Thank you and enjoy.

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"Breath," Adrianne ordered lightly and Lauren nodded her head as she stood next to the car, staring at the front door. The brunette moved to stand in front of her, pulling her attention away. "You're nodding your head but not breathing. Breathe or you're going to pass out."

"I'm breathing," Lauren stated firmly, actually taking a breath this time. Adrianne held her eyes for a second, not liking the tone of voice but left her when she saw the regret in the dropped green gaze. Lauren was just on edge.

"You'll be fine. Just relax."

"That's easier said than done."

"I know. You keep telling me that. Which then leads me to say that we can hold off on this to which you will reply-"

"I know. I need to do this, but that doesn't make it any easier." Lauren argued back.

"Then chill with the attitude. If you're you, they'll love you. If you are this... past, fake version of yourself with the glaring and the snapped remarks... not so much." Adrianne had gotten a good dose of how Lauren use to be on their trip to Chicago. She also found out very quickly that Lauren liked having her space. Adrianne loved to talk and be around people, constantly trying to hold Lauren's hand as they drove down the road, but the raven-haired wasn't having it after a while. The sweet raven-haired with the occasional attitude due to nerves or uncertainty had vanished a few hours into the drive. The old stone-faced, cold nature raven-haired emerged. Adrianne hadn't seen that before and wasn't too happy with it herself.

Lauren grabbed her hand as Adrianne began to turn and head for the door, pulling her back to her but still unable to look her in the eyes. "I'm sorry. I know you've heard me say that a lot lately, but I am. I just..."

"I would find it easier to accept it if I knew where all of this was coming from." The brunette stated softly as she held Lauren's hands in hers.

"But that's one of my issues. I can't open up."

"You can," Adrianne assured her. "You have in the past. It's just never taken this much prodding from me."

"That's because family is a touchier subject with me."

"And I've told you that you don't have to worry about them."

"And yet I still do. I can't help it." Both women paused and calmed their nerves. Their voices were raised with each delivered statement. "I was never allowed to be myself. Being me always came with consequences. You are asking, no, telling me to do the one thing that I have always been programmed not to do and expecting me to find it easy."

"Then why didn't you just tell me that?" Adrianne asked with a shrug and Lauren went wide-eyed.

"I did. I told you that your family was completely different and I always needed to keep up a front."

The brunette closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "Stating your family is completely different, just mean's they are different. And telling me that you had to maintain a front just means that you behaved a certain way while in front of them. Not that you denied being who you are all the time because of it. Therefore being yourself wouldn't be that big of an issue for me to expect from you. I need more information from you sometimes to understand exactly what you are trying to tell me. I don't have a lot of information about your past to go on. All I have is exactly what you tell me."

Lauren closed her eyes tightly as she felt the stress of everything coming down on her. Not just meeting Adrianne's family, but dealing with the thoughts of hers, and trying to go against her natural instincts to give her girlfriend what she was looking for only to be failing miserably in her eyes.