concept
where josh gets overwhelmed at a signing and he regresses
trigger warning!
mentions of self harm
arguing
being insensitive towards josh
near panic attack
also, just a little message before this. in my other book i use ddlb a lot and i just want to say, i don't support it anymore. i support age regressors , not ddlb
if you have questions, ask away in the comments :)
josh looked around at all of the people around them. he twirled a gold sharpie in his hand and looked up at the person having a brief conversation with tyler. she already spoke to josh, but she noticed how out of touch he was acting and decided to leave him alone.
josh was slipping into little space.
he tried his hardest to stay big; they only had 15 minutes left. yet, he couldn't keep himself big enough to hold conversations with fans. he knew he would feel bad once he's big again, but he just couldn't put his feelings into words.
all he was able to say was a little
'thank you' or 'nice to meet you' in a soft voice. he started to feel sad. he thought he was disappointing fans by not holding a conversation or that they wouldn't like him anymore after this.
there was a small space between
the next person and josh gathered the courage to tell tyler. he looked over and tyler looked at him. the taller smiled and josh gave a weak smile.
« what's wrong? » tyler said,
immediately starting to worry. josh looked down at his fingers.
« 'm not feelin' big right now, » josh mumbled. tyler could barely hear him, but understood. he nodded and held josh's hand quickly.
« it's okay, i'll talk for you, okay? »
tyler said in the voice he used for when josh was little. it was soft but raspy enough to feel safe. josh nodded as the next person walked up.
« hi! i'm jae! » the boy squeaked. he couldn't have been any older than 16. tyler smiled and said hello; josh waved. he held out the vinyls he wanted signed and josh tried to replicate his signature, but it turned into a scribbled mess. josh was still proud, though.
he slid it over to tyler and he
pointed at his signature with a cute grin. tyler smiled and mouthed 'good job'. josh looked up when the boy started speaking to them.
« you guys are such a big inspiration.
im trans and ive been having a hard time dealing with gender dysphoria, but you two have been such good role models a-and i hope that next time i see you, i'll have surgery! » the boy rambled.
josh didn't understand most of the
words he said, but tyler did. he smiled at the boy and nodded.
« its great you've found inspiration in
our music and our personalities. i don't really understand a lot of the stuff you're talking about, but i hope you're happy with your surgery! » tyler smiled.
« th-thank you! » the boy grinned childishly and skipped off with his signed vinyl.
—
josh was completely little by the
end of the signing. he was kicking his feet and playing with tyler's fingers under the table. luckily, there was a sheet over the table to cover what josh was doing.
