Total Eclipse of the Hart

My Hart's on the line

I sit down across the small window table from Julie, and smile to myself when she slides into the opposite booth and struggles to get her purse to not slide on the pleather of the booth. Before long, we're both enjoying our dinners and talking about the stupidest stuff, but with her even the little things become important and something to be remembered. After we finish dinner we tip generously and are beginning to leave when a big surly man approaches us. He looks pissed but I know I can handle this. He walks up and my heart drops when I recognize exactly who he is. Julie looked like she was about to pee herself, so I figured I'd have to deal with him. "Hey boy, go take your disgusting self out of here. The last thing America needs are more frigging lesbos like you two to have to deal with. Now move out of my way, you little shit." he says to me. Of course I've had rude bigots approach me before, but this seemed like Julie's first time and it pissed me off the way he made Julie feel like total trash. "Listen dickhead", I seethed, "I have every damn right to be here. And lesbians aren't America's fucking problem, pricks like you are. Now back the hell up from us." Or at least, that's exactly what I should have said. But I panicked and embarrased myself by simply grabbing Julie's hand and not telling him off. We walk out while the couple at the table next to us applauds. God I wish I could have thrown a punch but I knew I couldn't. Especially not anymore. Julie sighs in relief as we walk out of there and she seems to finally relax. "You okay?" she asks me. "Fine. Tired of ignorant pricks. There's a million of them here." I mutter, and she sweeps her thumb across my hand in a comforting gesture. And then I do something I'm ashamed of. The thing that breaks down the tough façade I had been putting up and makes me feel weak again. A tear slips down my cheek and I remove my hand from hers to try to wipe it before she can notice, but before I get the chance she was already there. She wraps her arm around my waist and she finds a fountain not in use at the end of the line of shops near a garden. She guides me to the edge of the fountain and we both sit. I stare at the dry well with all of the cracks it has and the dandelions surrounding our feet. Some more tears fall and I close my eyes and try not to start sobbing. I wish I could have cried alone. I don't want her to see me vulnerable. I feel so out of control and I can't control the small whimper that escapes from my throat as more tears fall. "Hey now," she says softly, "Don't worry about that douche bag. You handled that so perfectly Han. You are a gorgeous, strong woman. People clapped for you, Han. You weren't alone in that confrontation, love." I nod my head quickly, and yet I still end up crying for a few more minutes before Julie pulls me into an embrace and rubs my back slowly while telling me it's fine to let it out. I don't have the heart to tell her the people applauding were clapping for that asshole and not for me. I recognized them as well, and trust me they would have never clapped for me. Of course, I keep my mouth shut so she doesn't have to get involved in that. After what feels like me crying forever, I wipe my cheeks and look at her. Her eyes are filled with concern and she asks me if I want to talk. "I'm fine" I reply and turn away. "Bullshit" she replies, and puts her hand on my knee. "Hannah, please, if you ever need to talk to someone, talk to me. Alright? I won't pressure you to tell me, but I'm not leaving your side tonight. Do you want to go back to your apartment?" she asks, and I nod quickly. I really don't trust my voice to not crack so I stay silent while we head back to the building. 

We finally arrive at my apartment and I open the door and grab Frozen for us to watch. I start to make some popcorn and I drink some water so I can finally talk again. I grab the stuff and head to the couch. After putting the DVD in the DVD player I grab some blankets and cuddle on the couch next to her.