gargandice one shots

Christmas Cookies

"I'm gonna make cookies!" 

Candice LeRae and her husband Johnny Gargano were both drunk.
It was Christmas Eve, the two getting ready for tomorrow which was Christmas Day. 

"Ooo! Let me join you!" Johnny giggled, grabbing his wife from behind and placing multiple kisses on her cheek and neck. 

Candice let out a gasp, kissing his head before putting on her apron. "Where's mine?" Johnny whispered in her ear, arms still wrapped around his waist and his head rested on her shoulder. "You don't have one, remember? You insisted on not having one unless it said 'Kiss the cook!' " Johnny chuckled and shrugged. "Oh yeah.."

"How does this candy cane shape look like?" Johnny asked, perfecting the cookie dough shape. "It looks like a dick." Candice honestly stated. "Oh..Oh! oh, it kinda does." He leaned his head noticing the shape. "Keep it that way, I'll make dongs, dicks, tits and asses." Candice said, laughing out loud. 

"You're being serious?" Johnny asked, placing frosting on her lips. "Mhmm.." She replied, kissing him and smearing the frosting all over his face. "It's all over your beard!" She giggled, wiping it off. "And it's all over your face.." He said. He kissed her once more. "Got it.." 

"Back to the cookies.." Candice mumbled. "Or back to us.." Candice smiled. "Cookies..then us." She promised. 

The two spent an hour or so baking inappropriate shapes into cookies and maybe taking a few shots here and there. Candice took the cookies out of the oven, placing them on the counter. "Even though it's an ass shaped cookie, it still smells incredible." Johnny said, peeking over Candice's shoulder to take a look. 

"Wanna help me frost them? Wait until they cool though.." He nodded, Candice attacked his forehead with multiple kisses.

They finished frosting, giggling through out the entire time. "Dong..Dong...Dong..Dong.." She repeated in a sing song voice. 

"I'm," Johnny yawned. "Too tired, I'm heading to bed." "I'll join you soon!" Candice called out, washing her face and looking at her tired eyes. 

-

The Garganos finished unwrapping their presents getting ready to head to Johnny's parents house. "Ready?" Johnny asked. "Ready." Candice confirmed, pointing at her Christmas sweater. "Matching sweaters?" Johnny cracked a smile. "You know it."

When they were about to leave they noticed cookies on the table with a plate, a sheet covering them. "Hey...when did we make cookies?" Candice asked, pointing at the plate of cookies. "Don't remember, but let's take them, my family loves your baking!" 

"Oooh! You guys brought cookies?" Johnny's mom gushed, jabbing her finger at the plate. "Yep!" Johnny smiled, looking down at the cookies. Her mom removed the tinfoil to reveal dick shaped cookies. 

"Er.." Candice mumbled, looking up at Johnny. Johnny's eyes widened, remembering the night before. "We..uh.." He scratched his neck, not knowing what to say. "I.." They said in unison, staring at each other. 

Johnny's mom burst into laughter, waving his dad towards the group. His dad started laughing, holding his side. 

Candice and Johnny looked at each other, awkwardly laughing. 

"Merry..Merry Christmas?" They mumbled, offering them a dong cookie.

(A/N Happy Christmas Eve! It's currently 2:02 AM for me right now because I usually make really late at night! Sorry this is so short I'm kind on writers block but found this oneshot idea on tumblr and thought it'd be perfect for johnny + candice! Anyways, happy holidays!)