OBSESSED

19

tw: mention of suicide attempt

JARROD

My feet ached and muscles burned. Gritting my teeth, I pushed myself to keep up with the treadmill for another thirty seconds. Once I was huffing and puffing, my heart slamming in my chest, I lowered the speed and started my cool down.

The high of running kept my mind light for only a few minutes before succumbing to fatigue. I cut my cool down short and headed back up to my apartment. I rarely wandered through the building at this hour, since usually I was asleep. The halls were eerily dark and quiet.

I nodded at the security guard posted behind the desk and sauntered into the elevator. My body was now more exhausted than it had been an hour ago when I was tossing and turning in bed.

Realizing my attempt to chase Leah out of my thoughts and exhaust my mind had failed, I stumbled to my condo door in resignation.

I stripped out of my running clothes and collapsed on the bench in the shower. Pressing my head to the tile wall, I focused on the sting of the scalding water on my back. My ankles felt like cinderblocks.

Even so, the moment I closed my eyes, a vision of Leah appeared in my mind. This was different from the others, which had involved her contorted into various positions on my bed.

Now, she was standing before me, the water gliding down her soft, creamy skin. Her hair hung around her in thick, sandy ropes. Eyes trained on me, she wrapped her hand around my cock and tugged on the stiff length.

"Fuck," I groaned.

I forced my eyes open. It was just a fantasy, and I wanted something real.

Splashing my face with the water, I tried to rid myself of the lingering lust. The heat from the shower stream only drew more blood to my tip. My eyes fluttered shut again as I relented to the fantasy.

I pulled her into my lap, straddling her legs on either side of me. Our eyes held as I drove my cock into her soaking hole. Her nails dug into my shoulders and her cries resonated off the tile.

My erection pulsed in my palm, balls tightening. I was close.

"You're mine," I snarled, jerking myself harder and faster. Leah's face contorted with pleasure in my mind. "You're mine and I'll never let you go."

As her walls clenched around me, I busted hard and fast. I opened my eyes and watched the shower carry my load down the drain. Instead of relief, I felt more misery than before.

I rose to my feet and washed myself off. Even though I had an hour before I needed to leave for work, I threw on some scrubs and combed my hair back. The fog evaporated until my brooding reflection glared back at me.

The vibrancy and joy I'd seen yesterday had vanished. Darkness circled my eyes. Stubble shadowed my cheeks and my mouth stooped down. I looked old and grouchy.

Sighing, I massaged the muscles around my mouth and practiced a few smiles. It was no use. As long as I was apart from Leah, I didn't want to smile. I didn't care enough to even pretend.

I backed away from the mirror and stalked to the kitchen for breakfast. My thoughts continued to churn while I fried an egg and toasted a bagel.