But I'm Barely Breathing (A The Script FanFic) (Sequel to Millionaires)

Chapter 15- Twas the Night Before Christmas

Chapter 15- Twas the Night Before Christmas

*Guy's POV*

1am, Christmas day. Most people have started leaving by now; thank god; but sadly, I can't be one of them.  It's odd watching the drunk when you are (fairly) sober. I would normally be just as smashed as them, but not this year, I don't know why to be honest, maybe...maybe I don't want to the relief anymore. Maybe the thought of not being filled with all this...this pain, and anger scares me, because, if I'm honest, it’s all I am now. 'You can get addicted to a certain kind of sadness' they say, and maybe they are right.

Suddenly I notice someone come and sit next to me and immediately feel something is wrong; I mean, nobody is ever overly keen to sit near me...

"Do you mind if I finish that?" My brother’s voice says and I glance down at the glass in my hand, still half full.

"No, take it." I say passing it to him.

"Thanks." Sean says before tipping it down his throat in one swift moment. He lets out a sigh as he finishes and begins swivelling the glass between his fingers. I can feel he wants me to ask what's wrong...but if I'm honest I would much rather not; so I don't.

Eventually Sean seems to give up on waiting on me. "I'm worried about Luke." He says suddenly and I can't help but huff; of course, Luke, I should have known. Why is it always the young ones who get all the attention? It's always either Luke or Danny isn't it?

"I think...I think war has changed him...sorta, scarred him. I keep finding him...well...broken." Sean says to the ground.

I can't help but smirk slightly at this. Just imagining that young, stupid boy, so excited to go off to war, I'm glad he found out it's not just fun and games, he needed to learn a bit of harsh reality.

But then, I guess I can sort of sympathise with him...he lost Jay after all...And he and Jay, well I don't think I've ever seen such close friends. I understand how he must miss him and I understand the guilt.

But I still hate him. I'm still glad he is broken.

Maybe now he will realise what it's like to be me.

"You haven't noticed anything...odd, with him, have you?" Sean asks looking up at me and I shrug. "I mean, you've been sharing with him so I just thought...in his sleep...people reveal a lot when asleep..."

"You have as well; I mean that flat is pretty small, the Walls are thin." I say.

"Yeh, but Dan and I are deep sleepers, a feather could wake you." he says.

Now I think about it, of course I've heard him. Muttering, crying out, thrashing around; it's one of the outcomes of not really sleeping, there is more time I hear things, notice things.