Chapter XXX

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"I feel like shit," Sofia grumbles, chugging more water. I roll my eyes and don't respond. Didn't I tell her? Yes. Does she ever listen? Never.

I just can't wait for the game later today. This is always my favorite game to watch and my favorite to cheer for. The whole school is always there and the energy is incredible.

"Do you want some Advil?" Mindy asks, pulling out her stash of pain killers. Honestly whatever you need this girl has on hand at all times.

"Yes!" Sofia slaps her hand out on the table to accept the drugs from Mindy and with a quick slug she downs the pills. She wipes her mouth with the back of her hand, but misses the large drop of water rolling down her chin.

Before I can tell her, Aaron is taking a seat beside me. "Did Marcus talk to you yet?" he asks. I shake my head and furrow my eyebrows. Is something wrong?

"No, is everything alright?" I ask with worry.

"I don't know. He's been super moody today and I just assumed something happened last night," he replies.

"I don't think anything happened. He and I barely spoke last night. I was with Georgia and Nolan and he was with other people," I tell him.

"Alright, maybe you could figure out what's up with him? He's not telling me anything."

I nod. "Sure, when I see him later I'll be sure to ask him about it," I assure him.

****************

I stand by my car after school, waiting for Marcus to exit. When I see his head in the crowd I stand straight and walk up to him.

"Hey, Aaron said you were upset, what's up?" I ask and he turns to me with the most annoyed expression I've ever seen on him. I scrunch my face in confusion, what is up?

"Like you don't know," he mumbles and opens up his trunk to take out his duffel bag. He slams the door shut and I flinch.

"I don't, what's wrong?" I'm more than confused now, what should I know?

"You left me standing there like an idiot last night! Right in front of the guys. Do you know how embarrassed I was when you came up, said nothing to them and then left to go talk to other people?" he says in a scary, low voice I never thought I would hear.

"I-I didn't think about that. I just didn't know what to do-" I don't finish my sentence when he cuts me off.

"You didn't know what to do? You talk Amanda, with your mouth. You speak words using that brain you have in your head. What else is there to do?" his voice raises and I feel my defenses raising. He's not going to yell at me for making me feel uncomfortable around new people.

"Do you think it's easy to talk to strangers? Especially ones who never even looked my way through the whole time I was there? Especially when the conversation revolved around a topic I still have no idea what it is? Especially when you put in no effort to include me in this conversation?" My heart is pounding a million miles a minute arguing in public, but he can't think I'm in the wrong on this one.

"You were embarrassed? Well I felt out of place, awkward, like I didn't belong in that circle, so I left to be more comfortable with people who actually want to talk to me, okay? I'm sorry for making your masculinity quake but I'm not sorry for defending myself," I finish with a sigh and my voice shaking from emotion. I hate arguing with him, I really do. But I can't let him yell at me for no reason.

"I need to go before I say anything I regret. See you later Marcus," I say. I grab my own bag and head to the bathroom to change. I couldn't go in the locker room and be bombarded by questions from everyone right now, I needed to meditate.

I lock the stall and I let the tears fall. Even though I'm so mad at him, I hate that I made him embarrassed in front of his friends. I never intended for that to happen.

I blow my nose in a paper towel and splash my face with water. I take a look in the mirror and blink to get the watery look out of my eyes.

I step out of the bathroom and make my way towards the football field when I'm stopped by Aaron down the hallway.

"Did you talk to him?" he asks.

"Yeah, and let me tell you, your best friend's an asshole sometimes," I snap at him. I shoulder around him and I feel bad for my bitchy attitude, but I really can't bear to speak to anyone right now.

I throw my bag behind the bleachers and lay down on the grass, leaning on my bag for support. I whip out my phone and shove my earbuds in, signaling that I don't want to be spoken to at the moment, or for the next two hours if possible.

A few blissful minutes go by when I feel a tap on my knee. I use my eyeballs to look up at whoever disturbed my peace. When I see it's Mindy my annoyance ebbs away slightly. She's the last person I want to be a bitch to.

"What's wrong?" she asks. She sits down next to me and I sit up straighter to be face to face.

"Marcus is being an asshole," I say. I take my earbuds out to hear her better.

"What's the reason?" I fiddle with my ponytail and exhale lowly.

"He's upset that I didn't talk to his friends last night. I'm not sure why it made him so mad though, I really didn't think it was such a big deal."

She cocks her head to the side in thought. "Why didn't you talk to them? Were they not nice?"

I shake my head. "No, they were fine. I mean, they weren't rude or anything, I just didn't know how to enter the conversation so I left."

"I'm sorry I don't have any advice to give." She chuckles nervously and plays with her nails.

I wave my hand at her. "It's fine, I'm just pissed at him right now for putting me in a shitty mood."

"Girls!" Miller shouts from the back field to get our attention. "Warm up!"

******************

The game goes great. Perfect, really. The team wins and our section of the bleachers is celebrating through cheers and the boys are on the field having their own party.

And I'm still in a cruddy mood, all over what happened nearly four hours ago at this point. I couldn't enjoy the game, I didn't feel as happy as I should to watch my boyfriend and brother play in the homecoming game of my senior year. I felt like trash and that made me perform like trash.

"You going over Aaron's?" Lauren asks. I almost say yes, but then I look over and see Marcus staring right at me.

"No, I need to go home. Headache."

"Really? I hope you feel better. You know I had Advil if you needed it," she says.

Goodness gracious my bullshit answer has only extended our conversation.

"It's fine I just need some rest," I assure her.

Without looking back at the rest of the crowd I quickly walk to my car and speed out of the parking lot.


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