Dark Paradise

Chapter 17 (part 1)

~ There's no remedy for memory

Your face is like a melody

It won't leave my head

Your soul is hunting me and telling me everything is fine

But I wish I was dead

Harry's POV

I sat on my king size bed staring up at the ceiling, I thought it would be best to try and give Bel some space. I didn't want to stress her out more then she already was. This fashion show was big for her career, and I didn't want to intrude on the hard work she's done so far. But me being the selfish me couldn't help but long to see her. Slowly she was slipping from my grasp more and more, and I didn't know what to do.

I had thoughts on forcing myself on her, to make her realize that she did feel something towards me. But I didn't want to fall back on those habits again. I didn't want to fall back in to the darkness. But then again I knew I could never really escape it. In a strange way I wanted Bel to be inside my darkest everything. I knew she'd understand, she'd understand me. I wanted to know every single detail about her, and I wanted her to know every single detail about me.

Soon she'd go back to Paris and she'd forget about me, she'll just have the memory of me, and that's what killed me the most. Because for me she'd be more then a memory, she was part of my life, a very important one.

I grabbed the bottle of vodka and took a big gulp of it, I was going to her fashion show tonight. It was my last chance to show her, to prove to her that I love her. That I need her. I can feel the darkness begin to creep in on me. I was living some sort of paradise with her, and now the darkness is slowly pulling me away from her. From my paradise. And I couldn't allow that to happen.

Even if I have to beg on me knees, or forcefully make her cave in, I'll make her come to terms that I need her and she needs me. Because she would be my paradise and I'd be her darkness.

Bels POV

All morning I didn't have one second for Zayn or my grandmother, or myself. Luckily Zayn and nana left to go sight seeing. I was happy that they were getting along, though my nana was so convinced on that Zayn and me had a fling going on. I didn't have time to even think about her assumptions since I haven't taken a break since waking up.

All the models were set and knew what they were going to do. Even Yasmin was acting nice, which I thanked God for, I might have just snapped her neck if she began acting out. My outfits were in place, everything was set. Now it was time for me to get ready.

I had designed myself a dress months ago, when I found out I'd be attending and designing out fits for this years fashion show.

Ethan had sent some of London's best hair and makeup artist up to my suit as a little reward for my hard work.

As soon as I entered my suit I was pulled by the two ladies that would be helping me. They sat me down in front of my vanity and began to work. I couldn't help but notice the huge bunch of pink roses in front of me.

"Who are the roses from?" I asked one the make artist in hopes that she'd know.

"Ummm I believe it was Henry, or was it Harry. One of those two. Ethan's brother." She said, the roses were beautiful, I couldn't stop the smile that crept on to my face. Over all Harry was a good guy, a bit troubled but good. It was sad to know I would probably never see him again. Maybe it was better, I would never forget about my time with him. Both bad and good times, but the good times would stay fresh in my head. I guess he was a bit of a lesson and a blessing. He bought light to my paradise, but also added a bit of darkness to it. He evened it out a bit, but towards the end my paradise was more on the dark side.

But even now my heart still ached for him. I didn't want to leave things like this, but what could I do. Move on, I haven't seen him all this week, so I'm sure he has as well. Maybe the roses were a peace offering.

I took the small note attached to the roses and read it.

"Maybe it's not about the end,

Maybe it's about the story." I read out loud in my head. About the story, what did he mean by that. Me and Harry's story was quiet something. He made me feel things, but I really don't know what they were. Love? I wouldn't know I've never been in love. But he had a point, maybe I shouldn't think so much on our end, but about the things we went through. Was Harry worth losing after all we've been through?

*******************

I peaked my head though the curtains at everyone who was in the audience. My eyes landed on my nana and Zayn. He looked dashing in his all black suit, his eyes popped out more.

I saw Rosie and Quinn sitting there, as my eyes looked around they got stuck on Harry. He was here. He looked great as usual, his hair was covered by a black hat, he had on a see through black button up short, though the first three buttons we left unbuttoned. I could see his sparrow tattoos peaking out.

"Bel are you ready to go out and start the show." Jack, the guy who planned this whole even asked. I nodded yes.

"Okay you're up in five." He said an walked away. Okay, take a deep breath and try not to trip on your dress. I had my speech planned out, but I knew at last minute I'd wing it like usual. I had a black floor length dress, the back was open and I had a slit going through the right side, showing of my leg up to the top of my thigh.

I could hear the announcer introduce me. I took a deep breath and began making my way out.

I was blinded by the lights but kept on walking. Once I made it to the microphone I could hear the applause from the audience. My eyes quickly glanced over Zayn and nana. They lingered a bit on Harry, he sent me a gentle smile. He mouthed the words "good luck" and it made me feel good he still cared.

I knew this event was being televised, I knew that maybe my parents and sister were probably watching me on their tv with mouths wide open.

But I didn't think about it cos this was my moment.

"Hello everybody, I'm Belinda Hernandez. It's such an honor to have the chance of designing for this years fashion show in London.

There's so much I could say, but we don't have all night. First of all thanks to everyone who is here, or watching at home.

These designs were Inspired from a trip I took to Mexico with a close friend who is here in the crowd. We fell in love with the Aztec designs, the tribal look caught my eye and I put that in to my set.

Ummm from very early on I was told no, I was told I wouldn't make it this far. But here I am. I was told the way my life should be heading. I was told what I should be, but there came a moment where I was the one who said no. I told them no, I told them that this was my life. I wanted to create, I wanted something different.

The smartest man that probably ever lived Albert Einstein said, never give up on something you really want to do. The person with big dreams is more powerful then a person with all the facts. And I agree. So to very one out there, that has been told that there dream is stupid or wrong or anything. Well I say you can, you can do it. Your dreams are not wrong they are. I'm living proof of that." I took a pause and looked around, I had everyone's attention which was good I guess.

"Thank you and I'd like to hear a big round of applause for this years fashion show." I said loud and clear, everyone got up to there feet and clapped, I felt confident about my speech, I made my way to my seat by my nana and Zayn.

"You did great." Zayn whispered in my ear, his lips softly touched my ear lobe.

"Thanks." I replied. The lights dimmed out and the show began.