Dark Paradise

Chapter 25

~ Have you ever wanted to cry but no years came out, so you just stare blankly in to space while you feel your heart break in to a million pieces.
Like every morning for the past week me and harry woke up tangled up in each others limbs. Today his head laying on my chest, his curls tickling my chin. I played with his brown locks until he began humming in pleasure. His grip instantly tightening around me.
"Good morning beautiful." His raspy morning voice said.
"Good morning Harry." I responded, we stayed laying there just enjoying each others presence. Not thinking about anything else but just this place, this minute, and this moment. Everything about harry was kinda of addicting. The way he spoke, the way his lips felt against mine. The way that he didn't give up on something he truly desired. Those green eyes, his long curly locks, even the way he held me made me feel so safe and protective.
As ugly as this world was... Harry would always be beautiful to me.
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After almost an hour we got out of bed. I was currently taking a shower as harry was down stairs making breakfast.
I always hated getting out of showers, my wet long hair clung to my body, making me feel really uncomfortable.
"Bel, love you have a call." Harry called from out the door. I was only in a towel and didn't feel like walking out yet till I was ready.
"Can you tell them I'll call back when I'm done?" I said.
"You might want to take this call Bel." Harry said, I pushed my hair to my right side and clung on to my towel. I opened the door and harry handed me the phone.
"Hello?" I questioned over the phone.
"Belinda, it's me your grandmother." I could immediately hear the shakiness in her voice, that wasn't good.
"Abuelita what's wrong?" I asked right away. I clutched the phone tighter in my hand afraid of what she would say next.
"Bell, your grandfather... Oh I don't know how to say it." She said.
"Is he okay?" I asked, my heart was beating fast already.
"He...he was diagnosed with cancer and well it's a little to late..." The phone dropped out of my hands I didn't even hear what she said next. I wanted so badly to cry but no tears managed to come out. My grasp on my towel tightened to the point where my hand began to hurt.
"Bel what's wrong?" Harry questioned clutching on to my shoulders, but I was still in shock. My grandfather has cancer. The man who helped me become what I am today has cancer. The man who was like my second father has cancer. And is most likely going to die sooner than he has to.
Harry kept saying something but I couldn't really pay attention to what he was saying.
Everything was going so well, and now this. Couldn't life cut me some slack.
It was at the moment harry grabbed my face in his arms that I came back.
"Bel, baby listen to me. Bel look at me." Harry commanded. My breathing began to pick up, no this can't happen now, I haven't had a panic attack in years. It was getting more and more difficult to breath.
"Bel...Bel look at me. Listen look at me." Harry shouted, I tried looking at him but the need to breath caused me to close my eyes.
"Harry...... I I I... C-can't breath." I managed to get out. Harry pulled me into his arms and led us to the bed, sitting me on his lap. He rocked us back and forth, singing a song I didn't know but it helped me calm down.
"That's it Bel breath in." Harry whispered in my ear. After a few ten minutes I was calmed down, harry was rocking back and forth in his arms.
"Harry he has cancer." I whispered grasping in to to his T-shirt tighter.
"Shhh it's gonna be okay love." He soothes. So far I'm surprised I haven't cried. It's like I don't even have the energy to do so.
"He's going to die." I said, harry held me tighter, his right hand going through my hair.
"Shhhh baby he's still alive now and that's what matters." Harry said. I couldn't help but scoff.
"Yea he's alive for now harry. And in a matter of months or even weeks he could be dead." I said burying my head in his chest. There was nothing harry could say, because well there was nothing his could say. And it was okay that he didn't, I don't think anything he could have said would help me feel any better. All he could do was rock us back and forth on the bed, and I was grateful for just that.
"Do you wish to go visit him?" Harry asked.
"Yes, Ummm he's in Mexico right now. I'd like to go by the end of this week, I just have to settle things here. Would you like to come, or stay here to work out your own business?" I asked him.
"No I'm coming, I missed you seeing your parents again but I'm going to be there for you this time. Right next to you, like it should be." Harry answered.
"Thank you." I said latching my arms around his broad shoulders and pecking his cheek.
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For the rest of the day me and harry didn't do much, besides watch tv and eat. Which to be honest was the best thing at the moment.
"Have you ever been in love before?" Harry asked randomly, I peered up at him through my eyelashes. His lips showing a small smile, his dimples barely popping out.
"Before? No." I answered. "Now? Maybe." I added, his smile grew and he lightly pecked my lips. "What about you?" I asked him back.
"I actually was once. Or at least I thought I was." He answered, his smile faltered a bit, but didn't disappear.
"What happened?" I questioned on. He paused for a moment, as if remembering the experience, the frown on his face deepened. I took his large hand in mine, encouraging him to go on.
"Her name was Madison, she was very beautiful. No where near you, but very beautiful. That's what caught my attention." He leaned down and kissed my forehead.
"We were both young and naive you could say. That type of teenage love you could say. High School sweethearts, never apart at school or town. I loved her, and well I thought she loved me too." He said before stopping, taking in a deep breath before going on."I guess I was seeing what I wanted. I didn't notice the little things, the little looks she gave to my old mate John, I didn't notice the hidden smiles and winks. Or the long hugs. I guess I saw passed that as them being friendly to each other." He paused once again, his lips trembling a bit.
"One night, I planned on surprising her, climbing up her window, it was a usual thing for us. Made us feel like a cliche love story. There I was climbing the tree like I've done many times, but this time as I looked through her window, her curtains open as always. This time her and John were on her bed, making out. My best mate and my first love were making out behind my back." He breathed out.
"I'm so sorry." I said.
"That's what she said the next day, but "I'm sorry" in her case wasn't good enough, apologies are empty words. Like how my soul was at that moment. The void was unfixable. The damage was done. She came running back, but I was long gone by then." He spoke each word with such intense emotion."But even after all that I wish I could see her at this very moment."
"Why?" I questioned.
"So I could do this in front of her." He catches my lips between his in an intense kiss. I couldn't help but smile and so did he.
"You know what I did learn from that heart break though?" He questioned as we broke out of our kiss.
"What?" I asked.
"That's years of love, can be forgotten in the hatred of a minute."