Deception: The Journal

(My Silent Brother)

Cam was never the quiet shy type, he was a motor mouth and would get in any ones face.
But after my fall, ending up in the hospital for three days leaving Cam alone with our old man I lost my brother.
He won't speak, he barely looks at any one and he is literally glued to my side.
We were always close because of dad and the fear we had of him, we never slept alone.
But we never really cuddled in our sleep unless it was right after one of his crazy spells and one of us or both got beat up.
But we would usually wake up on our own side of the bed.
But now I wake up with his head pressed against my chest or side depending how I lay and his hands in a fist as he gripps my shirt.
I hear him whimper in his sleep.
I wish I knew what happened while I was in the hospital.
Angelica won't tell me anything she knows.
Cam sure won't.
I'm scared that I may never have my brother back.
Angelica assures me he's just in shock and it will pass.
But I don't know...
Today was weird with Cam.
Angelica ran a madicated bath.
I went and soaked a bit in the salt water and medication first.
Tucker brought it for us man it felt good.
But when it was Cam's turn he freaked out.
He literally screamed.
I ran in to see my brother with a towel wrapped around him staring at the tub full of water.
Now my first thought was did dad do something he's never done to us because I wasn't there to protect him.
But than I relized he didn't freak out with Tuck helping him undress he freaked out because of the water.
Angelica was behind me hugging me and assuring me he's fine its just going to take time.
I really am getting sick of hearing that.
Time isn't the problem something is seriously wrong, they know something but no one wants to tell me.
"Somebody better start telling me why my brother freaked out about getting in the tub before I scream just for the heck of it." I snapped.
I know weird ultimatum.
I'm twelve so logics are nothing to me right now.
Angelica sighed and knelt to my level turning me to face her while Cam sat in Tuck's lap still staring at the water as he rested his head against Tuck's chest he was exhausted already.
"Johnny...
The police think your dad was drowning Cam.
When they went to the hotel, they saw the tub filled with water and traces of Cam's blood probably form the wound on his head splattered everywhere in the bathroom." Angelica's eyes welled up with tears as she told me.
I looked over at Cam who was just staring at me now.
Cam got up and walked over and wrapped his arms around my waist and started crying.
The towel fell but he still had his boxers that wasn't a concern wouldn't be the first time we taken showers together. But this was the first time I got to see how badly bruised he was.
That old man used the belt on Cam too.
I could see his hand print bruise where he held onto Cam probably under the water.
He was covered in cuts, scraps, welt and bruises.
I know he needed to get in that tub and soak so he could heal.
"Can I try and see if he'll go in with me?" I asked looking between Tuck and Angelica.
"Sure just keep on the boxers." Angelica smirked.
I could see she too was hoping it would work.
Now this could be an issue.
If Cam is afraid of water how is he going to get clean.
Or swim, he loves to swim, he was half fish.
(His words not mine.)
I walked over to the tub with Cam.
As I tried to get in he kept tugging on me trying to pull me away but this is one thing I needed to break him of.
I can deal with his silence to a point but I will not have him be afraid of what he loved.
He loved taking showers or baths.
He would always sing or just goof around especially if I kept hounding.
But he wouldn't get out until he looked like a raisin.
I finally got in and sat waiting for him to deside to join me.
I was determined to sit there all day and night if I had to.
It was a good twenty minutes when he finally decided to join me.
He was shaking like a leaf as we sat shoulder to shoulder.
"Cam your safe now, no one is going to drown you.
Can I wash your hair?" I tried to asure him.
I wanted to take this opportunity of him being in there and get him clean.
I know he would feel better, he hasn't had bath since Travis was shot and I could see the dried blood that got on him.
Slowly I poured water over him making sure not to let it go down his face.
Cam was breathing heavy but he knows I wouldn't hurt him.
He let me wash his hair and face as he slowed his breathing I kept telling him each step I was doing so he wasn't suprised.
"Okay I'm getting out so you can finish up.
I'll be right here the whole time your safe Cam." I assured him as he watched my every move like a hawk as I got out of the tub.
I pulled the curtain so he could still see me but we couldn't see him.
I felt a wave of relief when he threw out his wet boxers and turned on the shower while draining the tub as he finished up he even pulled the curtain closed all the way.
Once done he poked his head out and reached for his towel that I got for him.
Once dressed we sat on the bed while I dried and styled his hair.
He seemed happier.
We both walked to the kitchen and joined everyone for breakfast.
Cam left my side to go up to Travis.
Cam forced himself on his lap.
Travis didn't mind, he always held us when we were sick or hurt but was forced to still preform.
"Cam honey Travis..."
"Mom its okay I'm fine." Travis assured her as he held Cam.
I sat in the chair next to them and watched as my brother was clearly concerned for Travis and needed to be near him as much as he needed to be near me.
Travis is tall, sixteen and muscular, he loves working out and being a big brother to us and Dina.
"Hey how are you doing squirt?" Travis pulled me in to his side with a hug and kissed the top of my head.
"Better now I guess." I mumbled as I looked up at my brother who looked more peaceful than last night and today.
But it was still to early to tell everything was still all to fresh.
After breakfast we watched cartoons.
Angelica picked them out so we are watching rugrats and Muppet Babies.
She didn't want us watching any violent shows.
But Cam was the one to get up and put in Looney Toones a much better choice.
Angelica was happy to see Cam was being involved and chose the cartoon he rather watch.
I was happy to hear him giggle.
I should have known better, we always watched Looney Toones when dad left us after abusing us and this always cheered Cam up.
Cam laid his head on my lap and giggled every once in awhile.
He grabbed my hand and made me tickle his head.
I could feel him relax as I played with his hair.
Dina looked back from where she sat on the floor and mouthed.
"He's sleeping."
Dina had a big grin seeing how relaxed Cam was finally.
But it faded when she looked at me, obviously I must have looked sad or something.
"We should play video games." Dina said as Travis took Cam to bed.
I don't know why he moved him, that was risky but Cam is a heavy sleeper a bomb could go off and he'd sleep through it.
"Don't worry he's still asleep.
How are you doing?" Travis asked as he flopped on the sofa next to me.
I am really getting annoyed with that question
Do the math.
My brother isn't my brother anymore.
My old man literally tried to kill both of us.
But all in all I'm fine.
I'm still talking and living.
As for Cam we'll never know, he won't tell us anytime soon.
Tears just decided to fall and I decided to retire to our room instead of playing the game or answering the stupid same question.
I rather be with Cam, even if I'm just watching him sleep, he's been doing that a lot for the past two days I been with him now.
But like I said its still all too fresh...
I found Cam's note book Angelica gave us when we got here.
I was surprised to see he wrote in it.
Poor Cam he knows what's going on with him isn't right and he can't control it.
So I was thinking if Cam is writing maybe he'll write to me, its worth a shot because this silent thing isn't healthy and maybe it will crack him out of that silent shell...
Now I forgot to tell you where they took us after the hospital.
Its an under the ocean city.
There are other people down here too.
There are these tube like halls that connect us to the other apartment homes and stores.
Tuck said its a place abused people come to and hide from their abuser.
Only certain people know about it apparently.
There's no real pictures of this place its not allowed but I found this in one of the magazines it kinda gives you an idea of this place.

Except in reality its more spacious and the buildings look like some thing from the city of Atlantis.
Travis said we are somewhere in the Atlantic but he doesn't know where either.
Tuck said they are so secretive and they gave us all a shot to ensure we sleep the whole way.
Kinda a good thing I guess...
I swear my brother has a radar that tells him I'm near, the second I sat down he wiggled is way to lay his head back on my lap.
I can't stand not knowing if he'll ever be the same again.
Its heart breaking reading his first entry.
I wish I fought harder with dad so I didn't get hurt and Cam wouldn't have been left alone with him.
I don't know why he was drowning Cam.
He never tried that with me and I always fight back.
I can't even imagine Cam fighting, he's too afraid to even speak to him.
He must have wanted to try something new and Cam was his lab rat.
Trying to see how far he could go before killing him...
Cam seemed a bit more alert at dinner.
After, we all played video games.
We let Cam pick it, Angelica wasn't to pleased with his choice it was a shooting game but we like those kind of games especially Cam who always chuckles when he gets head shots when he shoots my guy.
But things are different now.
"Mom he picked the game.
I can turn off the blood feature, it'll be fine." Travis assured her.
Cam sighed next to me when Travis said he was turning off the blood feature.
"You'll live." I nudged him playfully with my elbow.
Cam looked up and smirked than laid his head on my shoulder.
He stayed that way till he relized he wasn't getting enough kills and his guy kept getting shot.
He sat up and focused and kept snipering us off.
Cam start laughing as we kept groaning and asking where he was hiding none of us could find his hiding space that we kept walking into and die before seeing the space.
"Okay boys time for bed." Angelica chuckled as she covered up Dina who fell asleep on the couch.
I went ahead of Cam and laid out the extra book next to his with a note on it that said...
'Please use this to talk to me.
I swear I won't tell anyone, just please talk to me.
This will be our shared journal where we tell each other everything and anything.
What's written here stays here, unless its life threatening to either of us.'
I wasn't sure it would work but when I walked in after going to the bathroom I saw Cam sitting on the bed with his note book next to him and he was writing away in our notebook.
I stopped Angelica from interrupting and we both sat in the living room watching a comedy waiting for Cam to come for me...