ʜᴏᴡ ᴛᴏ ʟᴏᴠᴇ ᴀ ᴍᴏɴꜱᴛᴇʀ//ꜱᴇʙᴀꜱᴛɪᴀɴ ᴍɪᴄʜᴇᴀʟɪꜱ x ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ

the start of it all

y/n was left in silence as she changed.she slipped on the clothes sebastian left for her,he didn't speak a word, only eyeing her before leaving. the look in his eyes, it was almost like he was in a trance, only wanting a good feel.it was a familiar look, scary.

y/n slowly slipped on the clothes, trying to pass time. her mind wandered about her past.

-

"you know i'll do anything for you" he smiles, holding my face in his hands.his warm hands, on my cold face, it was a nice feeling.

"i know' i smiled, resting my hands on top his."you always say that" i glued my eyes on him, his pink eyes staring back at me.his hands disappeared from my face, ruffling my hair so sudden.

"your so adorable!i would kill for you!" he smiles.i knew he would, i saw it happen before.but i wondered how far would he go for me

"would you even die for me?' i whispered silently

-

'I'm not lonely', those words y/n always repeated to herself. she didn't want anyone's pity, it was she who made him leave her. she knows he can never come back to her.she will never see him, never be able to hear his voice, but still, she miss his warmth.it finally came to realization, she lost him forever and it was all her fault.''why did i do that to him?' she thought, leaning against the wall, feeling weak. her body shivering from the cold wall.she blamed it on jack to lessen the gulit, but she knew deep insdie it was all her.'how could i?your never coming back'

"i-i'm so lonely without you" she whispered, letting the tears fall."i miss you so much" it was a mistake to end him.no matter where y/n went, she saw him.his voice whispering in the back of her head, his scent still lingering in her nose, she could remember how much she felt when he loved her. she hated him for what he did but she couldn't forgive herself for not asking the question to see if it was true and he was willing to stop. she wanted to forget it, she just wants to be forgiven, anyone would be fine. but she really wanted to be forgiven by him.

"I'm so lonely" she sobs, trying to wipe away the endless tears.

'why is it so hard?i come to terms and yet...i can't-' the thought made her silently scream. the realization that she lost her sunshine, her world, as cheesy it sounds. everything seemed so dark, and it's her fault.why did she have to push it? she knew he would do anything, so why did she have to push it?

why did it take so long for her to realize it was her fault and not jack's? he played as a loyal lover for one mistake a human would do, she just killed him. he left her with a broken heart and half of her soul.despite it, she can't blame him but herself. she wants to express it, but can't.she just wants someone to understand her and comfort her. telling her it was for the best and it wasn't her fault.even if someone could understand it, just a little, it would be okay.

it was only worse when she realized when she has fallen for that demon that left the bathroom just minutes ago.

-

meanwhile, sebastian sat on y/n bed, his leg bouncing impatiently, awaiting for y/n.his eyes shining brightly pink into the darkened room. he kept a still face as he stared at the bathroom door. tempted he was to get up and go inside, he sat still on her bed.

the manor was silent and eerie, uncomfortable.the curtains pulled to cover ever window to block the shining red moon.it was useless to do so, demons have desires, the moon just helps him achieve those desires.

impatient

-

finally y/n calmed down, her quiet sobs led to hiccups.she felt tired, just wanted to sleep.she felt more drained then possible.she pushed herself on the wall to get up, her legs shaking in the process.she picked up her dirtied clothes and towel before exiting, she only wanted to sleep.

her eyes made contact with the demon who stared blankly at her."sebastian?" she called out, moving to the window to let some light in.she only saw his pink eyes that terrified her, she didn't want the room to be black with his eyes following her. she tugged on the curtain, revealing the red colored moon.she froze, realizing Sebastian's odd behavior.she should have went to undetaker's parlor when she had the chance.

finally lust, desire

y/n thought of how she could get away from the demon, jumping out the window- sebastian would catch her.running out the halls- would wake- "my dear y/n" y/n flinched when she noticed sebastian standing behind her.his mouth near her ear, feeling his hot breath.his hands placed on her hips, holding her in place.despite sebastian not wanting to so anything that would make y/n resent him, he couldn't help it.

y/n felt his eyes wandering all over her figure, like an animal watching its prey.she stiffens up, she felt too weak to activate her kagune, she would lose to him.a small squeak escaped her lips when she felt Sebastian's smooth lips on her nape, giving her light kisses, little sucking here and there.

"w-what are you doing?" she squeaked, trying to weasel herself free but his grip tighten.

"nothing" he teased, blowing into her ear."i wouldn't do anything of the sort" he whispered, pressing himself on to y/n.y/n remembered how cruel demons are when it came to mating, they would even kill the person and mate with the corpse. always jack protect y/n from those demons but how she's alone and weak. tears sprang into her eyes, she tried not to be loud but it didn't waver sebastian.

rough, careless

"h-hey sebastian, i-its late-late" she spoke, trying to push him away but once it failed the fear set in."s-stop it" she spoke softly, not wanting to see Sebastian's tempter, she wanted to live and not die."s-stop that!"

"so pure and adorable.don't worry my love, i'll make it pleasurable" he whispered.she wanted to run but couldn't move, she stood there frozen not sure what to do.."you aren't going anywhere, my love" he twisted her, finally pressing his lips on hers.y/n winced from the sharp pain in her collarbone and lip.the burning feeling on her demon mark, and the open wound on her lip. it stung like hell, like millions of wasps are taking turns in stunging in the same spot.the pain felt like it was going to kill her.

she hates this, she just wants to be with undertaker and luke.

the stages of a lustful demon