Conflicted Eyes, Confusing Feelings | Complete

t h i r t y - t h r e e

Important quote for the chapter here.
Song for this chapter is 1000 Words by Sweetbox.

It's an OST for FFX-2, one of the most beautiful love songs I've ever heard in my entire life.

For those who want to listen to it and get in the mood for this chapter, I'll put a *.* to dictate when you should start playing it :)

* * *

The best kiss is one that has been exchanged a thousand times between the eyes before it reaches the lips.

* * *

Xander was leaning against his car, toying with an unlit cigarette when he caught sight of Sage stepping outside in the same attire he'd been at the cinema. The boy's frail hands slid up to rub is arms as the first helping of the chilly air caressed his delicate skin. Like a timid child's, his brows were meeting at the center of his forehead as he bit his lips, seeming ineffably regretful and hesitant to even venture outside.

Though it had only been about an hour since Xander saw Sage, he felt as though months had passed since then. At that, a red-hot rage shot through Xander, resulting in him crushing the unused cigarette whilst fighting off the urge to seriously harm himself.

For his idiocy.

Memories of just earlier infiltrated his mind.

Twenty minutes ago...

"Thank goodness, Blaze. I thought you were really hanging out with that gay girl-boy." Jennifer commented as her back met the wall of the empty bathroom, their lips parting. Instantly, she hoisted herself up, wrapping her legs around the waists of the boy who had her pinned to the wall.

Xander's eyes flit open, rolling them shortly after. He garnered an abnormal urge to smack her for referring to Sage in such a slack way, but again, he forced self-maintenance. "Yeah, whatever." he murmured, letting his hands dip under her blouse, gradually working their way into her cotton bra. Before he could, however, Jennifer's hands shot up to grip his wrists.

"Blaze, wait. You're going too fast."

Again, Xander paused, then annoyed. If she thought that he was going to be gentle and 'make love' to her, then she was sadly mistaken.

Xander's vocabulary for sex wasn't elaborate. The only two words he knew were 'fück' and 'sex'. Nothing more, nothing less.

After all, neither was there anything passionate or special about sex to him nor was he 'gentle'. At that moment, he would merely participate for the purpose of taking his mind off things and proving to himself that he didn't want Sage.

Not emotionally, not sexually.

"You're rushing into it," she whined. "You know that a girl has gotta be prepared."

Her sparkling blue eyes locked with his pale ones, and without awaiting a response, she gingerly cupped his face before pulling his face downwards as she was dropped onto the counter. Before long, she was syncing her lips with his in a deep, sensual kiss, one that portrayed her undisguised eagerness. Pulling away, her eyes were half-lidded as she stared at him, cheeks flushing, lips curling in a smile of satisfaction.

"Your lips are sweet, as always. I wish they were mine," she said with a trace of melancholy that Xander, of course, picked up on. Narrowing his eyes, Xander fixed her with an indecipherable look.

"We both agreed that this was just sex, yeah?"

Jennifer tried for her cutest pout as she reached up to cup his face. "Oh, come on, Blaze. You don't have to be that mean. We'd make a cute couple any day and you know it." she remarked before leaning forward to taste his lips. Stimulatingly twirling his hair around her manicured fingers, her pout remained even as she pulled away again. "Or are you holding back because of ... Maria?"