Chapter 37

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"She came onto me!"

I quickly walked away from him, wiping tears off my cheeks in the process. "Don't," I said quietly. "Just go."

"This is fucking unbelievable," he hissed. "Who do you believe more, Riley or your boyfriend?"

"I don't know anymore," I whispered. He walked over to me slowly, placing his hand on my cheek. "Kissing me won't make it better," I said, shrugging his hand off.

He couldn't believe what he was hearing. He let his arm flop down to his side. "What's wrong with you?"

"I don't want to be a stepmom Justin!"

Okay, so I technically wouldn't be a stepmom. That's definitely what it would feel like though.

"Oh," he raised his eyebrows. "You're breaking up with me because I'm expecting a kid now?"

"Not just that," I looked at the floor. "You're never honest with me. I refuse to be in a relationship with someone who lies."

"I didn't know how to tell you," his voice cracked. "I was going to eventually Jess, I swear."

"I had to find out from your mom," I whispered. "Then Riley told me it was all your idea."

"That is not what happened," he breathed out. "Not even close."

"Mind telling me then?" I crossed my arms over my chest.

He sighed. "We weren't together when it happened Jess. You and I, I mean."

I felt my heart twinge. "So the second we're not together, you decide to get her pregnant?"

"It wasn't like that," he shook his head. "The way Riley told you made it sound like I raped her for Christ's sake. It was her idea, but I'm not going to sit here and lie to you saying that I opposed to it."

I didn't know whether to be relieved that he was telling the truth, or hurt that he didn't oppose to it. "I get it," I said. "I do. But now there's a child involved Justin. You can't put me through that."

He nodded, his eyes welling up. "You're right," he said. "I can't put you through that. You don't deserve it."

I stood still where I was, not looking him in the eye.

"It just sucks, you know?" He said, leaning back on the counter. "I didn't want a kid with Riley," he stared at the floor for awhile, then lifted his head, looking me in the eye. "I wanted one with you."

My heart erupted from the cute words, but I tried not to cave. I was trying to find something to say, something to change the subject.

"It wasn't the same with you," he shook his head slightly. "With Riley I did it to do it. With you it was so," he paused, raking his brain for the right words. "Different."

"Different bad?" I tested.

He smiled at my humor. "Different good," he looked deeply into my eyes. "I did that with you because I love you," he stood up tall, staying where he was. "I still love you."

I couldn't say anything, I didn't want to say anything. I needed to keep my guard up. "I-"

"I told you this in the car that day, and I'll tell you again." He took a step closer. "There's such a difference between having sex and making love. I didn't get to experience the difference until-" he paused, looking at me quickly. "You let me experience that for the first time." He stepped closer until he was so close that I could feel him breathe, his fingertips running up and down my arm. "Only you."

I looked at the floor, taking everything in my power not to cry.

He took a step back, nodding. "I'll be gone by the time you get back from work."

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