𝕀𝕗 𝕓𝕪 𝕔𝕙𝕒𝕟𝕔𝕖 . - J.Mz & B.Hd

19. Find me.

He fucked it up yes. Wait why did he fuck it up? Why did he even walk away and leave Ben like that? He didn't care, he just wants to get home and probably never even see Ben ever again. He didn't even want to tell this to Rami or Gwil, not that he knew how to tell them this. 

Joe decided that he just needed sleep, alot of sleep. He just needs to clear his mind that's all, last night was not like all those other nights they fucked. And even though Joe did have a crush on Ben, he still has trouble with it. 

Joe was off all day, his eyes could be looking at you but his mind was far away wandering trying to look for answers. 

" So that's when I died and came back to life with fucking wings. " Rami ended his story he was telling Joe. The boy snapped out of his gaze. " That's cool. " He said as he gave his friend a reassuring smile. " Okay tell me. " Rami said rolling his eyes. " Tell what? " Joe asked him raising his eyebrow. " Are you serious? Something clearly happened you're acting way off, is it Ben? " Rami had to be blind if he didn't see Joe flinch at the mention of the name. " What? No. " Joe looked down, fiddling with his fingers. 

" Don't you dare lie to me Joe I know when something's wrong. " Rami pointed a finger at his friend. " The you probably don't need an answer to that question huh? " Joe gave Rami an off smile. Rami sighed deeply as he pinched the bridge of his nose. " Did something happen? " Rami asked carefully. Joe sighed, " Alot. " he said. Rami gave him a questioned look. 

" We.. " Joe trailed off again sighing. " We, fucked. " Joe muttered. " Okay, again? Just as always? " Rami stated as he looked at his friend who was quiet. " Not like that. " He said an Rami looked at him and realization hit him. " Oh. " Joe nodded at him with a bitter smile plastered on his face. " It was just so, different. I felt, loved. " Joe breathed out, fiddling with his fingers. " And you seriously think that leaving him in the morning like a one nightstand really solves everything? " Rami asked. " Whatever he was a quick crush, I will get over him in no time. " Joe brushed it off waving his hand. " Joe. " Rami called him making the boy look at him. " Admit it. " Rami said. " Admit that this isn't just a quick crush. " Joe scoffed, looking down. " What am I else suppose to do? " Joe asked trying to swallow the pain in his throat. " I know Rami, for fuck sakes I know It's not a quick crush but what am I supposed to fucking do? " Rami looked at his friend infront of him in pity. " Maybe he's not a quick crush for me but I surely am for him. He doesn't care that I left, why would he? I treated him like shit anyways. " Rami saw the tears welling up and tried to hold his hand but Joe pulled it back. " It's okay. " Joe said. 

Rami amde sure Joe arrived home safely after their conversation that felt like it was going on for ever. " Are you sure you're okay? " Rami asked, leaning against the door frame. " Yeah. " Joe nodded showing a smile. " Well, actually no but it's okay. " He corrected himself. " I'm glad that we don't live together, that would've been hell. " Joe let out a short laugh as some moments of them ran through his mind. Rami however saw that Joe was more upset about it than he showed. Well of course, the boy couldn't trust nobody at the beginning of the year and with just a short time he became more social than anyone. And now the reason for all of that is just gone, just out of nowhere. 

" I'm tired. " Joe said. " Oh, uh yeah. " Rami replied giving him a smile out of pity. " Are you sure you're gonna be okay? " Rami asked putting a hand on Joe's shoulder. " Stop asking, yes! " Joe laughed prying his friend's hand off of him. " Yes. I'm gonna be okay, just need a whole week to probably recover and cry it out. " Joe laughed it off but Rami was more concerned now. " Okay then.. " Rami said looking at Joe who was smiling. Little did he know that when Joe closed that door he broke down in a crying mess. 

hello sorry for not updating but i was busy with school and shit. ANYWAYS as yall might know or not idk i have this unfinished fic called " Another love " and i really hate it rn but i will remake it with a much better plot since i've dreaming again and BOY the whole story looked like a typical teenage highschool shit but idc it looked fun so 👁👄👁