The Flames that Engulfed Us

Chapter 17: Sorry to Interrupt, But Food

Lincoln wrapped his arm protectively around me. The five girls were staring at us. Well, four of the girls were staring at us, Kassidy was specifically not looking at us, which was a sign that something was wrong.

"You can sleep in the gym tonight. We'll get started in the morning."

Then, they all turned, their hair doing a perfect angry swoosh as they pivoted. None of them coughed or spat or anything, so I assumed they'd managed to keep it out of their mouths. They'd have to tell me how they did that. But their amazing ability to do that aside, they were gone. Kassidy lingered for a moment before following them. She was surviving.

Lincoln's arm didn't lessen around me as we were alone. He still hugged me to him, something that I appreciated. I expected Gary to walk in again, his voice splitting my head apart, again.

My boyfriend knew me well enough not to feed me lies about how I was safe. I wasn't. He didn't say that he would protect me. We both knew he could only try and fail. Lincoln didn't lie, a level of respect I loved him for. But even if it wasn't true, I wanted to hear those things. I wanted to be told that someone had it all under control. I wanted to be told that there was structure, an organization to the chaos.

Because structure can always be manipulated, but chaos, true chaos, is aloof to any influence I could try to exert. Chaos must be tamed before it can shift into something else.

If you try to tame the chaos, you end up with a scolding hot frying pan in your hands, an unattended stove, and blaring fire alarms. The moral of that sentence is: don't cook when you're home alone. Bad things happen.

Lincoln's arm was enough though. It kept me from curling up into a ball and giving up. It kept me pressed against him, a reminder that he was there. We were together.

"Where are we going to sleep?"

He seemed surprised by that. "We?"

"Well, where are you going to sleep while I lay next to you, bored out of my mind?"

He chuckled. Then his face stiffened again as he realized how limited options we really had.

"We could use the mat that looks like it's for martial arts training."

"Good idea."

We made that plan, and he sat down on a bench near the mat in question. I slid down next to him, running through what I would do if Gary's face appeared in front of me just then. I would attempt to hide the pain, but would I succeed? If I failed, who knows what Lincoln would do. If I succeeded, I would just succeed. There wasn't much to that side of it.

"Sky," Lincoln asked thoughtfully, "do you want me to stay up with you?"

Yes. I wanted that so much. So, I said no. Like a liar.

"You need to sleep. I'll be fine. I don't want you to be cranky in the morning."

"Are you sure?"

He had to be so tired. As tired as I had been last night when I'd fallen asleep. Which was odd, because something in me knew that was an anomaly. I knew that it had only been because of my interaction with Gary.

"I'm sure."

I was sure that the second he was asleep, I would go insane. I was sure that he needed the sleep more than I realized.

"When's the last time we ate?" he asked suddenly.

"You ate that cereal yesterday morning," I remembered, "and I haven't eaten since I died."

"Yeah. It's so weird that you're not eating. I never thought that would happen."

I stood. There was a water fountain in the back of the gym. I'd seen it during my confrontation with Gary. There had been snack bars scattered around it.

"I'll be right back."

I broke into a sprint. I went fast, faster than I even knew I could. I grabbed a handful of them, my breathing just as light as it had been sitting and rushed back to Lincoln. His eyes scanned my face as I dumped them onto his lap. I threw myself onto the bench next to him, grinning at the thrill of the sprint.

He peered down at the food.

"How did you find these?"

"I'm just amazing like that. Now eat."

He complied. He ate. He ate all of them, discarding the wrappers without any care for them. He'd have had to be hungry. He hadn't eaten much at all. When he was finished, he stared wistfully at the pile of waste he'd made. That's always been my disappointment with food. There's really something to that saying, you can't have your cake and eat it too.

I stood up.

"Come on. Don't litter."

"But," he stood next to me, "I'm in hell anyways."

"And I'm supposedly an angel, so I feel obligated to tell you not to litter."

He smiled, taking my hand. He looked way too happy about that response.

"Hell yeah, you're an angel. You're my angel."

I laughed with him. He pulled me along in a slow walk to a garbage can. He made a big show of dumping all his papers in, turning to me and smiling. He wrapped his arms around me, kissing me. My heart beat fast like I was suddenly paying for all my unpunished exercise. He pulled back.

"Happy now?"

"What?"

He chuckled. He had the audacity to laugh at the way he made my head spin. His laugh made me fall in love with him all over again, though. I didn't protest as he leaned over to kiss me again. I wrapped my arms around him, allowing the stupid gym to melt around me. I let myself sink into him, smiling as I did. At that moment, that was what there was for me. Not Gary. Not Angels and Souls. Just me and Lincoln, the way it'd always been.

I broke away. "What flavor where those snack bar things?"

He laughed again, sending a thrill through me.

"Were they grape? I could taste something there, and if that's what I fed you, I feel like I need to apologize."

His laugh died away. "Seriously?"

I shook my head and kissed him again. It really did taste like artificial fruit, but I didn't care.