Chapter 35

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Well, it's been awhile. I love writing with all of my heart - but ever since the school year started, I haven't updated. I miss it a lot. So, here's an update my loves♡.

Bella's POV

It felt as if little knives were poking into my heart. They wouldn't stop stabbing me. Nicole... Was gone? I never thought I'd live to see that day. I wished I could take it all back and save her. It was all my fault.

I dropped to the floor, tears spilling out of my eyes continuously. My hands covered my face - too embarrassed to show. I couldn't believe it. My best friend, the one who had been there for everything with me, was gone.

"Doc, this can't be right. She has to be alive!" I screamed, tears streaming from my eyeballs. Ryan hugged me and pulled me back once I stood up. I wiped my face and nose and yelled, "please please do something!"

"I'm so sorry Miss Bella, but there's nothing we can do. We've run as many tests possible. Nothing. I will leave you alone." He turned around and left.

I turned to face Ryan and I stood there... Motionless. He looked at me in the eyes and whispered threw simple words: "let's go home."

***

I stared. I sat in my bed and just stared. There wasn't anything I could do. Nicole was gone. I missed her so much. I wished I could take it all back and kill the damn guy who killed her.

Ryan was in the kitchen making me a pizza. He knew the only way I could get out of my depression was food.

Nicole's parents knew. We told them before we went back home. Her mom didn't believe me but her dad did, and started crying. He told me he would explain to her later.

-2 weeks later-

I was slowly recovering from my depression. Time passed, tears left my eyes constantly, memories flowed through my head - but most of all, I spent a lot of my time praying.

I wasn't a very religious person but I started to have faith. I needed it. I needed comfort that Nicole was in a better place now.

Ryan sat next to me as he and I both watched TV. We were watching a Ted Bundy series. I very much enjoyed learning about criminals and their cases. It had always been one of my interests.

"You look so beautiful," Ryan whispered in my ear as he tucked a strand of hair behind my ear.

I looked over at him and stared admiringly into his deep blue eyes. I loved him.

A fat tear escaped my eye. "I am so lucky to have you."

He looked at me with pure affection. "I can't believe I found you. I'm truly the luckiest man alive. I love you so much Bella."

I couldn't think of anything else to say, so I pulled him in for a kiss. His lips were soft and they moved perfectly with mine.

His tongue slipped into my mouth as he grasped my neck, leaning into me. His other hand was in the small of my back. His lips melted into mine; a moment I was going to cherish forever. I loved our kisses, I would never get tired of them.

His fingers made their way to the top of my flannel. He unbuttoned them, from the top to the bottom.

He gazed at my body with both love and lust.

I got on top of him and ran my fingers through his hair. He peppered kisses all over my chest. His tongue licked my skin lightly.

"Thank you Ryan," I whispered, staring into an abyss of emptiness.

His fingers lightly trailed over my skin, giving my goosebumps all over my body. "Thank me for what?"

"Keeping me happy." I leaned down to look him in the eyes. "Its hard to be happy with everything that has happened, but you..." I didn't know what to say. "You can change my mood in a second."

"You're welcome," he chuckled. He kissed my forehead and played with my hair.

"You know ... " Ryan whispered. "These clothes?" He pinched a piece of my flannel and flashed it at me. "Would look a lot better ripped off your body."

"Really?" I asked, smirking. I loved his dirty talk.

"And this body of yours..." Ryan gawked at my body and licked his lips.
"Would look a lot better tied up to a bed."

"Is that so?" I asked, laughing.  I grinded on him. I bit my lip and leaned in a little more so my breasts were in his face.

I grabbed his head and whispered in his ear, "what's stopping you?"

He looked at me eagerly. "For real?"

I nodded, giggling as he picked me up and he ran for his bedroom.

****
LMAO. long story short, i died. corona bit me in the ass so i'm sorry its been a solid 8278229 years since i've updated.

but also, since we're basically quarantined and have nothing else to do, i decided to write a chapter bc why tf not.

this book is definitely rearing toward an end tho! like maybe a final chapter or two with maybe a few bonus chapters ?? maybe a bonus chapter on mary alice's future life?? idk???? my ideas are irrelevant feel free to ignore them

anyways my loves, please stay safe!!! wash ur hands and dont get corona please🥺

ilyyyy💗

xx
CloudiLynn

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