sugar baby [h.s]

nineteen

We walk in silence for a while but I don't really care, mostly just because I don't really know what to say. It feels normal; just holding hands and walking down the street. I know as soon as we actually start to talk about 'this', things won't be as nice. It was out of line of him to just show up at my work, even though I know deep down I was really hoping I would see him today. My head and my heart keep clashing when it comes to the subject of Harry, it's so hard to think straight when he smiles at me and tells me what I want to hear. Even if I feel deep down that it's all just a game, a ruse to make me feel like I should change to be what he wants me to be.

"Buy anything at the auction last night?" I ask him eventually as we turn the corner, the park now in sight. I look up at him as he nods his head.

"Yeah I did, I was feeling charitable" I grin softly, like he needs an excuse to spend money. "I wish you had stayed" his tone becomes a little more serious, but there is still a softness there. Maybe I should have stayed, maybe I've been making too big of a deal out of all of this? No I haven't, and I can't keep making excuses to make it all okay.

"It was weird seeing my photo in the paper" I smile a little, I'm not going to agree and say I should have stayed with him but I'm trying to stay on subject. He grins and strokes the back of my hand that he's holding with his thumb, back and forth and back and forth.

"I can imagine, many people point it out to you?" He asks. I nod, on top of the people from work others had definitely noticed. My mum called me while I was at work and then text me back saying to call her tonight, she must have seen it.

"The people at work did, a couple of girls I went to high school with messaged me asking about it, my mum as well. Didn't realise that many people actually read the society pages" I reply as we enter the big black gates that open into the park. Bright yellow sunflowers circle around us as we start to walk down the path, I'm so glad they're back in season even if it is for only a little while longer.

"Mhmm, what did our friend Ryan have to say about it?" Harry asks. I roll my eyes and smile up at him, trying to decide how much information I should give him about Ryan's opinion.

"Well, he now refers to you as Mr Money Bags" Harry lets out a chuckle and shrugs his shoulders.

"Wow, I suppose even some idiots have smart thoughts sometimes" He smirks and I give him a stern look, but it's only stern for so long before it turns into a giggle. Sometimes Harry's
arrogance is more endearing than it is annoying, but that's only sometimes.

"He's not an idiot" I try in vain to defend Ryan, but it doesn't help much as he scoffs slightly. We arrive at a fountain as our pace slows down significantly. It's so peaceful and calm, I hope we don't fight and ruin the serenity for everyone else around.

"He made an honest mistake and asked me out when he thought I was single, you don't have to hate him you know. You're choosing to" I lightly cajole him with a soft smile. Harry looks at me out of the corner of his eyes, the ghost of a smile on his lips.

"He wants you, he wants what's mine. I'm keeping an eye on him" I raise my eyebrow slightly as I watch his tongue slip out and wet his bottom lip, man it's distracting when he does that. Keep focus Elena.

"What's yours? How possessive of you when last night you were quite dismissive of me" the shortness of my tone surprised him as he stops walking. I stop also as he peers down at me.

"I wasn't dismissive" he says, there's slight tilt in his voice as though he's unsure.

I nod. "You were, kind of. I wanted you to comfort me and reassure me before we got to the event and you just told me to follow the contract. Then at the event when your 'friends' were embarrassing and belittling me you sat by and did nothing" I try and keep my tone neutral, like a lawyer stating the facts before a court. My heart pounding in my chest does make me feel like I'm on trial, defending my actions.