sugar baby [h.s]

thirty four

The kettle had just finished boiling when I heard a knock at the door. I'm glad Harry gave me enough time to clean up my apartment, as I walk a clean line towards the front door instead of hopping over my pile of dirty laundry and my open suitcase. I unlock the door and open it up to see a calm looking Harry dressed in a clean black suit with a white dress shirt underneath, unbuttoned at the top. His lips curl into a smile as I open the door.

"Hi bubs" he says gently, I smile softly and open the door wider for him to walk in. He does, allowing me to shut the door behind him and lean against it for a moment.

"Tea?" I ask, "I've just boiled the kettle" he nods his head, scanning over my apartment. Probably comparing it to some sort of shoe box or tomb.

"Yes please love" Wow, someone brought their manners to this conversation. Speaking of, I have no idea how to start this kind of a conversation. I feel like I've already kind of forgiven him in my mind, but I can't pretend it didn't happen and move on from it. We agreed that this was for real, so our fights and reconciliations have to be real too.

"How was your meeting?" I ask as I take down two mugs out of the cupboard. Harry leans against the back of the couch, unsure of what to do with himself, watching me intently. Maybe I should have given him a kiss at the door, or at least a hug, put his mind at ease a little?

"It was fine, my trip to New York's been moved up though" He replies. I pour a little bit of milk into mine and look up to meet his gaze, giving him a slight pout.

"When do you go?" I ask.

"Day after tomorrow. For a week" I pick up the mugs and carry them over to the couch, putting them both down on the coffee table. He walks over to join me as I sit down, curling my legs up underneath my body.

"That sucks" I mumble quietly as he sits, not directly beside me but less than an arms length away. He sits on an angle, facing his body towards me.

"You could come with me darling" he offers quietly. I turn my head to look at the sincerity on his face. I wish so badly that I could say yes.

"I can't, I have two tests next week that I can't miss without a valid excuse" I reply, playing with my fingers.

"I can get a doctor to forge you a note?" There's a slight hint of amusement in his voice, and his lips slowly grow into a grin as I gasp at his insinuation.

"Harry that's terrible!" I say, with a half laugh. He shrugs his shoulders, tilting his head to the side slightly.

"I know, I just want you there" he mumbles quietly, lifting his hand up to stroke my cheek softly. I let him, a soft smile spreading across my face at the gentle touch.

"I'm sorry" he begins quietly. "For everything that I said to you last night. I didn't mean any of it, it's just that, well Jack is a bit of a trigger for me. We went through some shit a few years ago and so he promised my mum that he would keep his distance from both you and I. When you said that he had talked to you, it sort of room my straight back to that dark place I was in with him. And I took it out on you, which I shouldn't have done. I'm really sorry bub" My heart breaks for him as he apologises to me. I reach out and take a hold of one of his hands, stroking over the back of it with my thumb.

"It's okay, I'm sorry too" I reply. His eyes narrow at me slightly as I speak.

"You have nothing to apologise for" he says sternly, I shake my head.

"No no I do, I think I may have blown it all a little out of proportion. I shouldn't have implied that you only care about me for sex" I mumble quietly, feeling the heat rise in my cheek as I mention sex. Why am I such a prude, shouldn't that have gone away now that we've had sex?