Pragma // s.b.

37

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"Remus, stop!", I gasped, tears of laughter streaming down my face as I was spun around in a sort of Irish jig by the sunny faced boy. "Never!", he called, twirling me and dipping me so low that the ends of my hair brushed the snow below. James stretched out on a blanket nearby that Lily had brought with her down to the frozen lake, and she now sat crossed legged on the edge, tracing patterns into the frost below.

"I got the food!", Liv called from a few feet away, her arms full of treats from the kitchens. Remus immediately dropped me in a hasty effort to lend a helping hand to Olivia. Rolling my eyes and brushing the snow off my clothes, I sat up. To say it was cold was an understatement, but Peter wanted to go outside and watch the snowfall over the lake, so there we were. A fire cracked near us, casting light over the group.

I rubbed my hands together, the friction creating heat. I involuntarily shivered and pulled the sleeves of my Hufflepuff sweater over my hands. "Here you go, sunshine. Wouldn't want you to freeze", a deep voice sounded from behind me. A thick jacket wrapped around me and I realized it was Sirius' leather one. My cheeks flushed, and I couldn't help but feel ecstatic. "When did you get here?", I said as he settled next to me, "And thank you", I finished awkwardly.

"Just now", he answered, scooting closer, "And you're welcome", he subtly mocked me, causing me to laugh. His breath curled visibly in the cold air, fading into the night. We had barely seen each other since the kiss. Glances across the Great Hall, slight smiles as we passed in the hall were all that we had shared since that wonderful night. I didn't know if I should bring it up, wait for him to say something, pretend it never happened?

I trained my eyes on the fire, not bothering to brush the flakes of snow out of my hair. We sat in comfortable silence, his arm brushing ever so slightly against mine. Daring to glance at his face, I suddenly realized something. "You haven't been smoking", it dawned on me that I hadn't seen a cigarette between his lips in months. He let out a laugh and shook his head. "For someone so smart, you really are clueless", he shifted so we faced each other, one of his legs propped up beside him.

I raised an eyebrow. "I quit as soon as I realized how much it bothered you", he said slowly, watching my face carefully. My mouth fell open slightly. I racked my brain for when I had first told him how I felt about the death sticks. "That was at Ro's tryout!", I exclaimed. He nodded. "That was so long ago!", I said incredulously, "I still hated you then". "Dark times", Sirius joked, but I continued to stare at him. "Why would you do that for someone that despised you? Couldn't even stand to be in your presence? Hated the ground that you walked on?", I leaned in with every word.

"Okay, Carter, calm down. We get it", he lifted his hands in surrender. I pushed them down so I could see his face fully once again. "I'm serious", I slightly grinned, unable to keep the strict tone in my voice. Sirius contemplated for a moment and then softly let out, "I never have, and don't think I ever will, be able to say no to you".

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As Christmas break neared, my will to go to class decreased exponentially. I just wanted to lay in bed all day and cuddle with Poppy or have snowball fights with Sirius, James, Peter, and Remus or walk around and admire the decorations with the girls. But, sadly, I couldn't. The last thing I wanted to do was be shut up in the corner of the library with my nose in a book, but that was where I found myself every night, and this night was no exception.

Olivia sat directly across me, Remus to my diagonal. "I hate Defense Against the Dark Arts more than anything else in this world", I groaned, burying my head in my hands. "Would this help?", the smell of piping hot chocolate mixed with pumpkin juice filled my nose and my eyes shot up. "I love you, Sirius", I exhaled, groaning at the sight of the steaming mug. I took the piping liquid from his outstretched hand and taking a deep drink. It wasn't until I was halfway through my second drink when I saw his wide eyes and slightly raised eyebrow.

I spit out a mouthful of hot chocolate right onto the pages of the book and hastily set the cup down. "No, not like that", I sputtered. Liv burst into a fit of laughed. "I say that to everyone", I said, my face bright red. Remus sat silently laughing, and tears now streamed down Olivia's face. "A little soon, don't you think Carter?", Sirius said, a hint of laughter behind his words. "Shut up", I grumbled, doing my best to mop up the drops of hot chocolate with the corner of my brown sweater.

He slid into the seat next to me, leaning over my book to see what I was reading. "When are you gonna give up on trying to memorize all this crap?", Sirius said, trailing his finger across a diagram of a pixie. "Never", I said, pushing his hand off and scanning the page. We fell into a comfortable silence. Liv and Remus worked on finishing their Potions essays while I copied sections of the book into my notes. Sirius sat fiddling with his wand, causing gold sparks to trail through the air. I couldn't help but look up at him every once in a while, and every time I did, he was staring at me unashamedly.

The sun was fully set now, and yawns frequently made their way out of my mouth. I had reread the same sentence multiple times and not registered what it said once. With a sigh, I slammed my book shut. Sirius jumped, his eyes snapping open. "Jesus, Bri", he said, rubbing his eyes and looking up at the clock on the wall overhead. It was nearing midnight, and as much as I didn't want to admit defeat, I knew I wouldn't be getting anymore work done.

Reaching my arms up above my head, I stretched and let out one more yawn. "I think I'm gonna have to call it a night", I pushed my books into my bag and began to stand. "Ha! I knew that even the great Briony Carter has a stopping point", winked Sirius who stood too. "Hilarious", I rolled my eyes. "I'm almost done", Liv said, pulling her hair back, "I think I'm going to stay until I finish". Remus nodded in agreement and the pair returned to their work. "See you in the morning", I smiled, blowing a kiss in their direction. I looked in Sirius' direction as if to say, "Are you coming?". He tilted his head to the side, a ghost of a smile falling on his lips, "Night Mooney, Olivia".    

We walked in silence down the corridor towards the Hufflepuff common room. Sirius had insisted on walking me there since "if we got caught he was much better at getting out of sticky situations than I would be" since he was "much more attractive than I was". Pretending like I wasn't thrilled at the opportunity to spend more time with him, I begrudgingly agreed.

"So", I let out, "What are you doing over the break?". Great one, Bri. Riveting conversation. He let out a snort and glanced down at me, "That's what you're going with?". I bit my lip and stared forward. "Yes, Sirius. That's what I'm going with", we turned a corner, the portraits on the wall staring at us and whispering as we passed. "If you would really like to know", he smiled with a fake sweetness, "I will be staying here as James is going on holiday and my family is made up of the worst creatures to ever walk this earth".

We had reached the round door leading into the common room. I froze. This was the first time he had brought up his family since accidentally letting something slip so long ago. "Nothing to say, Briony?", he leaned against the wall. My chest burned. I opened my mouth to say something, but he cut me off, "Don't worry, love. I'm not asking for your pity. Just not all of us have a cozy little home to go back to. Not all of us want it either". Crickets filled the silence, and I folded my arms over my chest. We looked at each other, daring one another to say something.

"Okay", I said suddenly, "Come home with me then". I had caught him off guard. His steely exterior faltered and he stared at me blankly. I leaned against the wall, matching his posture, "If it's not too cozy and little for you of course".

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Authors Note:

Hi guys! So I was just wondering if y'all would be interested in me uploading pictures of what I envision the characters to look like/ their aesthetics or if you would rather me not so y'all can continue to envision them yourselves? Leave a comment and let me know!

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