Heartstrings

Chapter 31

                             Inked souls

*Heaven's POV*
My tattoos have always been exposed, and people always noticed them. Some gave me compliments, others scolded me or were retorted by them, but never once had someone asked me about their meaning. I sit up and light myself a cigarette. I tuck a stray strand of hair away and start explaining:

_ "This rose was my first tattoo. I was young and going through a-lot, so I decided to rebel. I thought of it as "you can't have a rose without it's thorns" as in nobody's perfect. We all have our imperfections but are still beautiful." He just stares at me, his eyes twinkling in interest.
Then, I tied my hair into a bun, revealing my dandelion tattoo on the back of my neck.

_ "They say if you blow a dandelion causing it's petals to fly away, you get to make a wish, and those wishes come true. So this one I like to think of it as a symbol of freedom and wishes coming true." I continue, taking a drag from my cigarette. I'm not used to talking about myself nor opening up, so all this shit was making me nervous. But if I wanted Landon to trust me, I had to show him I trust him.
I take a deep breath and proceed.

_ "The heartbeat on my wrist... is my mother's last heartbeat. I got it in her honor, as a memory that once, when she was still alive, everything was okay. That I was once happy."

My mother was a very sensitive topic to me, and her passing was tragic. I was once a normal girl, who looked forward to life, who was happy and who had everything she needed.  I had goals, ambitions and a flame burning inside me. But now that flamed had dulled. I don't even know what's keeping me alive and going. I mean I basically have no family, no stable life, and no one to love or love me back. Am I even capable of loving? Am I worth being loved?

I felt my throat tighten and hot liquid began to sting my eyes. Involuntary I let out a sob, then resume through shaky words.

_ "the word fight on my ribcage," I lift my top a-bit, just enough for the tattoo on my ribcage to be visible, "isn't just as in fighting in a physical manner. Yes I got it when I joined the Underground, but what it really means is that nothing in life comes easily, and that you have to fight for what you strive to become, for what you desire to achieve and what you long for." Another sob escapes my lips. Get it together Heaven, goddamnit!

I then felt a warm presence closing the space between us. Landon wrapped his strong arms around me, radiating heat and affection. I wasn't going to cry in his arms again. I didn't want to be weak, but there is just something about him that gives me comfort and the feeling that whatever I do, I'll be accepted by him.

_ "I think it's enough for one night" he whispers softly in my ear. I hug him back and nod in agreement. "How about I tell you a-bit about my tattoos?" He asks.
I nod again in agreement as I wipe away the few stray tears with the sleeves of my jacket.

We stand up and I just stare at him for a while, embracing his godlike features.

^Landon's POV^
_ "You know I always wondered where your tattoos start and where they end." She says in a low raspy voice, staring at me inocently. Her angelic face shimmered and her big amber eyes glistened under the moons effulgence. I turn my back to her and took off my jacket, then my shirt.

*Heaven's POV*
Landon began undressing in-front of me. First he took off his jacket, and as soon as his shirt was off, I was projected to a world of ink. I couldn't help but let my eyes wander across his body. His back towards me, I studied the tattoos running down both his arms, from his shoulders to his wrists, and covering his back. The aureola brought his tattoos to life as they seemed animated and moved along with his breathing rhythm. It was breathtaking.

^Landon's POV^
I felt a burning sensation as Heaven ran her fingers on my skin. Chills ran down my spine and shock waves shot through my body. She traced almost every tattoo on my back with her delicate finger. I flinched under her touch as she made my senses run wild, but remained still as this feeling grew on me.

_ "You have a lot of roses on both your hands, any specific meaning to them?" She whispers over my shoulder.

_ "Roses are my mother's favorite flowers. She loves them and even planted a whole garden full of roses herself. I got them because... well, I'm what people like to call "mommy's boy". I love her more than anything in the world and would do anything for her." I pause, chuckling as I gently shook my head. "She also named my little sister Rose, and I obviously also love her a lot. I may sound weak and soft, but I'm not ashamed of loving my mother and sister." I shrug, trying to seem nonchalant.

*Heaven's POV*
The way he spoke about his mother was truly admirable. The way his features softened, an adorable smile appeared on his face and his tone changes into one I've never heard before. The stars in the sky had no compare to the shine in his eyes, as he spoke about her.

^Landon's POV^
_ "And there's nothing to be ashamed of." She reassured, moving from behind me to face me. "I find it very attractive when a person speaks so highly of their parents and cares for them as much as you do. That's not a sign of weakness, but a sign of strength. You have a reason to fight for, someone you love..." her voice breaks and her eyes tear up once again, "who loves you back." Her quivering voice tore a hole in my heart, but she wiped her tears away and smiled at me. A smile so warm and genuine, I couldn't get enough of it. She was so understanding and supportive even though this was a very sensitive topic to her. She didn't turn cold or angry, nor did she ask me to stop talking at the mention of mothers and family.

Heaven grew up with a loving mother up until her early teens. After that everything collapsed. With her mother's passing, she was the only girl left in the family. Her father turned abusive and tortured her and her brother both physically and mentally. He deserted her and led her sibling into a bad lifestyle, leaving her to fend for herself. Despite all that, she still didn't abandon them. She knows that deep down her father and brother are still the ones she knew before the tragic accident. She until now, having moved out, goes back every weekend and fills their fridge with food instead of giving them money which she fears they will use for more drugs and alcohol. She truly was an amazing person. I contemplated her caramel orbs, which for the first time, didn't try to hide the true emotions she had been locking up inside of her. Through her eyes I could see every inch of pain, abuse, suffering and mourning she had to go through, and I knew, she could read my eyes as well.

*Heaven's POV*
His cerulean eyes scintillated in response to me opening up. Through his sky blue orbs I saw that he too, doesn't have the easiest life. He had told me his father is forcing him to take over his business, even though he didn't want anything to do with it. Through his deep ocean eyes, I could sense all the horrible events he had to witness, I could feel his confusion and ache.

Landon and I connect on a completely different level than any other people do. I knew that he too was a gang member since Justus and Athena mentioned accidentally that he works in the same field as them. Being a gang member isn't easy either, and I can only imagine the things he had seen. Things that will leave him traumatized for the rest of his life. And because of that, because of that very connection we share, Landon and can never be just friends...