"Taehyung?"
Is this a dream? All this time, through all the pain and torture he endured, it was Taehyung all along. His Taehyung. Kim Taehyung. He feels tears threatening to fall. This can't be real.
"I-I..." Taehyung tries to speak but choked up.
For some reason, Taehyung looks just as surprised as Jungkook, and it doesn't take that long for Jungkook's anxiety to start skyrocketing. But no, everything is how it's meant to be. This is how it all falls into place. Jungkook can have his happier ever after; all he has to do is seal the deal.
Jungkook shortens the gap between them, going in for a kiss, but Taehyung backs away, looking like he saw a ghost.
"Tae... hyung?" Jungkook's throat starts to feel scratchy. What is happening?
"Jungkook..." Taehyung drops his head, looking down at his feet. "I-"
"What is wrong?" Jungkook asks, wanting to take another step closer, but is now fearing that Taehyung will take another two back.
"I'm so sorry," Taehyung finally says, repeating repeatedly, "Sorry. I'm really sorry... I-"
"What are you trying to say?" Jungkook is lost. He thought everything was falling into place.
"If I knew, I wouldn't have-"
"Don't say that!" Jungkook cuts him off, tears breaking the seal of his eyes. "Don't joke around with me. Just-" He pulls Taehyung into a hug, but Taehyung doesn't hug back.
Why?
"Hug me back," Jungkook pleads. "Like before..."
Taehyung doesn't move.
"Please," Jungkook begs.
"If I could go back, I would do everything differently."
Jungkook removes himself from Taehyung, looking at the boy with blurry eyes. Taehyung is still head down, his bangs hiding his eyes from Jungkook.
"I didn't think any of this would happen. When I found out you were writing notes to yourself, I decided to write one to see your reaction... But then I got way too invested."
"Y-You knew this whole time?"
Taehyung nods.
"I caught you writing them. When you showered, I opened the drawer and read them."
Jungkook looks down at his feet, mimicking Taehyung's posture. His tears drop akin to the start of raindrops dampening the ground underneath him.
"I shouldn't have..." Taehyung stays motionless. "When you said my name, I felt horrible."
"I-It just slipped out... I didn't mean to."
"You mean everything to me... I just don't want to-"
"Don't say it. I can't handle it. After all this... I can't." Jungkook is ready to run. He doesn't want to hear it. What's the point of saying, 'I don't want this to ruin our friendship' when it already has? Jungkook was all in because he can't return to how things were. He can't erase these newfound feelings so easily.
"Jungkook..."
"Don't Jungkook me. I can't believe I gave myself to you so blindly. Literally!"
"I'm sorry."
Jungkook needs space. He isn't ready to think about how he will live his new unrequited life. So he runs.
He runs and Taehyung doesn't even protest. Jungkook slams the door behind him and slides down into a crouching position, back against the door. The tears won't stop. He can't even remember the last time he cried this much-perhaps he's never hurt this much before either.
He tries to stop sniffling and looks up at Mina, who is frozen with a slight gape a few steps down from Jungkook.
"You-" Mina's voice cracks.
Jungkook doesn't know why, but he feels the need to explain himself. But it was too late; she had already turned on her heels and ran back down the stairs.
Jungkook wonders how long she was standing behind this door.
"Great. Just what I needed," Jungkook scoffs, wiping his tears.
💌
Jungkook waited at the door for almost an hour, hoping that Taehyung would come back inside and make everything better, but it didn't happen. Jungkook gives up. He left school early that day and spent the rest of his night locked up in his room, rereading all the stupid notes he got from the note-writer. Perhaps he's now in denial. He won't even refer to the note-writer as Taehyung out of bitterness.
Jungkook's feelings stay mixed and jumbled. He hates Taehyung, but at the same time, he misses him. He doesn't want to see his face, but at the same time, he wants him to come over and kiss away all the pain.
Jungkook doesn't go to school the next day. Or the day after that. He's in his room pretending to be sick so his mother doesn't get suspicious. He thinks about all the schoolwork that he'll be behind on when he decides to return and it only makes him want to stay here longer.
He's had no contact with Taehyung since the rooftop. He's upset that he didn't even get a phone call or even a text message asking if he were okay.
Everyone but Taehyung had messaged Jungkook. (Everyone being only Soobin)
Soobin:
Are you not coming to science class?
Soobin:
Are you sick?
Soobin:
We made cupcakes in food studies. Want me to leave some for you?
Naeun:
Did you talk to Jimin?
Naeun:
My patience is running thin
Jungkook sighs. He doesn't even have the energy to reply.
The sun is going down; another night contemplating his existence. Another night of-
Jungkook stops mid-thought, hearing something hitting his window.
The sound happens again, prompting Jungkook to drag himself out of bed before cautiously walking to the window. It's probably just a bird.
He spots Taehyung with a handful of pebbles, looking like he is just about to throw one. Taehyung waves.
Jungkook silently shrieks, running away from the window. He looks at himself in the mirror and continues to have a meltdown. What the fuck is Taehyung doing here? And why does he have to show up when Jungkook looks like a complete mess?
More pebbles hit the window, and Jungkook groans, quickly fixing his hair with his fingers before returning to the window. Jungkook opens the window and whisper-shouts, "What are you doing here?!"
Taehyung goofily smiles and shrugs. "Can I come up?"
💌
A.N:
Love you all
YOU ARE READING
A Note to Myself | Taekook
Fanfiction[COMPLETE] Jungkook is jealous and all he wants is to be admired like his friend, Taehyung. He comes up with a plan to write love notes to himself in an effort to one-up his friend; however one day, notes start appearing that he, himself had not wri...
