Contreltophobia (8BitGaming) *New Version*

Hey...

Hey guys. There really isn't any way for me to say this. My cat, Shadow, passed away the other night (September 3rd).

I can't explain how I'm handling this. My emotions are fine until I go up into my room.

Everything hits me like a fucking tidal wave. Realizing that my furry friend is actually gone. There's no explaining how I felt when I rushed up the stairs to greet him and see nothing. Somehow...forgetting.

It feels so empty. I'm alone. I don't hear his sleepy snorts, I'm not petting someone as I fall asleep, I'm not getting woke up by wide yellow eyes.

I just want my fucking cat back. I wanna wake up from this nightmare! I can't be in my room without having a breakdown. It's hard to breath and I cry myself sick.

I watched him die. He died in my own room. I hate being here. I can't look over at certain spots because I wanna see him there.

I've been screaming "BRING HIM BACK!" and "PLEASE WAKE ME UP!"

If that's progress then I'm being just fine.

I just wanna hug him, hear him. I just want my little fat buddy back.

So I definitely won't be updating for a while cause I'm 100% not in a good place right now. I'm so so so SOO sorry.

I'm not focusing, my emotions are all over, my mental health is through the roof.

[R.I.P Shadow]
[Nov. 2005 - Sept. 2019]