Chapter 28 - Ashes - IV

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  Alden was the last one through the door, finishing off the odd semi-circle of people facing Rachel and Grey-eyes on their bench. He wanted to look around the library a bit more, but at the same time he certainly didn't want to wander off alone. Never again, as far as he was concerned. Going off alone had only gone terribly for him in Rallsburg.

  Rachel hadn't spoken since Natalie had walked in. The girl had insisted on being the first one through the door, though she'd been forced to leave Gwen waiting outside. Natalie proceeded immediately to Rachel and sat down in front of her expectantly, like a kid in class waiting for the teacher. Alden suddenly remembered that, despite all her accomplishments and her fearsome capabilities, Natalie was still so young. Out of the entire crowd of people, she was the only one who couldn't be considered an adult, or even a teenager.

  Rachel was staring into empty space, while Grey-eyes watched her carefully. The rest of the group was dead silent. Alden felt a collective sense that to speak up in this place, waiting for Rachel to start the meeting, was somehow disrespectful. The group silently agreed they would wait for their leader to talk first. Thus it became a waiting game stretching on for minutes, as Rachel continued to stare and the group slowly became more restless.

  Natalie finally broke the silence, though tension still hung thick in the room. "Rachel?"

  Rachel's eyes fell to the girl sitting cross-legged in front of her. "Yes, Natalie."

  "Are you okay?"

  She took a deep breath. "No, not really."

  "...I'm sorry I couldn't save more people." She wiped her face on the sleeve of her windbreaker, then looked back up at Rachel expectantly. "What should we do now?"

  Rachel took a very long time to answer her. Her eyes drifted out of focus. Natalie fidgeted in place watching her, picking at one of her nails nervously. Finally, Rachel spoke up, in the same tired voice she'd been stuck in for days. "I don't know."

  "C'mon, Rachel," started Julian. "We won, so what's next?"

  She laughed, in a disturbing and disheartening way. "We didn't win."

  "He is dead, right?" asked Jackie.

  "Yeah," Alden confirmed.

  "So we won," Josh concluded.

  "Twenty two people survived," Rachel said quietly. "Twenty two out of hundreds. No one won."

  "We're still here," said Hailey, standing next to Jessica and her parents.

  "So go live your lives."

  "We don't have lives left to live," Jessica's dad replied angrily. "Our home's gone, our town is gone. What are we supposed to do now?"

  "Hey, lay off," Josh cut in.

  "I think she still has a lot to answer for," added Jessica's mother. "Why did all this happen? Why didn't she stop it sooner? And why hasn't my daughter said a word since we got here? What did you do to her?" Jessica was watching each of them in turn as they spoke, but she seemed to hover equally between Hailey and her family, without quite committing to either one.

  "Rachel is not responsible for what transpired with your daughter," Kendra replied, lending some real weight to the voices backing Rachel.

  "What would you know about it, Miss Laushire?"

  "I've worked closely with Rachel for over a year now, and neither of us were aware your daughter was acquainted with magic until the last few days. Whatever occurred was beyond our knowledge."

  "You, then!" she railed on, spinning to face Hailey. "You've been living with her, this is your fault!"

  Hailey opened her mouth—about to retort in equal measure—but Jessica grabbed her by the arm. Hailey faltered, looking at her friend, and Jessica shook her head. Alden wondered how much she actually understood, but it was clear from her expression that she just wanted them both to shut up. Hailey fell silent, but Jessica's mother wasn't so quick to back down.

  "I heard all about that town hall, and everything after! You knew about this monster way before he came after us. Why didn't you do anything to stop him?"

  "Lady, you try fighting a god," said Julian.

  "But—"

  "Can you shut up?" interrupted Natalie. "Please?" she added, after the looks of surprise at her outburst. "Who cares whose fault it is?"

  "...How did it happen?" asked Boris, when no one else spoke up in the wake of Natalie's question. "How did he die?" Alden expected he was as much asking Grey-eyes as he was Rachel, but Grey-eyes was totally silent, and looking very uncomfortable to be so close to the center of attention.

  "He attacked us at our home—" Ruby started, but Rachel spoke only a moment after she did.

  "I shot him."

  She spoke with such finality that the room was stunned into silence yet again. Rachel simply didn't want to engage with anyone. It seemed painfully unlike her from what Alden had seen and heard. Rachel was someone who loved to be at the front of a crowd, and now where she should have been completely in her element, she just wanted them all to leave.

  Cinza took a half-step forward, Ruby keeping her upright, placing them in front of the semicircle facing Rachel. "You called us all together, Rachel," she prompted. "This is everyone. What did you want to tell us?"

  "Why her?" Jessica's father asked. "Why're we listening to her?"

  Dan coughed. "Mal, she was elected, by more than half of the people here. She's in charge."

  "So what? Jackie was elected."

  "So was Josh," Joe put in. "How d'you feel about listening to him?"

  "That's enough," Jackie interrupted. "I wasn't elected to lead. And as for Josh, no 'ffense, but Rachel should definitely be in charge."

  "None taken," said Josh. "I agree with you."

  "Which brings us back to the point," said Neffie. "What did you want to say, Rachel?"

  They watched expectantly. Rachel took a deep breath, and finally, her eyes seemed to refocus on the people standing around her. She still didn't look any less miserable than when they'd first walked in, but she at least seemed to be properly lucid.

  "We have to hide."

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