Chapter 25

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  "Mom! You're back!" I shout, jumping into Mom's open arms. "I missed you!"

   "I missed you too, baby girl." Mom releases me."Let's go home. Thanks for letting her stay here, Dems."

   I hug Demi and head out. Keegan sits in the front and Mom drives."So, Adrienne. I was wondering if you would like to be a bridesmaid at the wedding?"

   My eyes widen." Seriously? Yes!"

    She just feels bad for you.
    You're gonna ruin her day.
     She's gonna marry him and have kids of her own. She'll forget about you.
    They're both gonna hurt you. Just like your dad.
   No one wants you there.
   Don't you see the disappointment in her eyes.
    You're a fuck up!
    You know you want to!
    Your arms are itching for it!
     Do it!
      Bitch!
     Whore!
     Fatass!
     Slut!

     I walk to the bathroom and turn on the faucet. Mom thinks that she has all of my blades, but I still have at least five left. I sink down the wall. If I do it on my arms, she'll find them.

    I lift my shirt up and place the cold metal on my hip, pressing down smoothly. The blood bubbles up at the surface. I repeat this many times and stop the bleeding.

    I broke my clean. I was two weeks on the way to recovery. Now, I'm nowhere near recovery. And I don't feel guilty.

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