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5.Why does it hurts❓

Y/N POV.

"Get out" He said as I looked at him shocked,confused and hurt all at the same time.

I looked at him and he had an expressionless face the whole time.

I got up as I was holding on my tears so hard and trying not to cry.

I opened the door and got out as I laid my back on his door frame and covered my mouth.

I went inside my room as I sat down in front of the window as tears fell from my eyes.

"When I thought that finally he was getting soft and all nice and I won't lie I started to have feelings for him but I was wrong".

A guy like him can only think of himself and not anyone else.

But why the hell am I crying so much?

Why the hell does it hurts so much?

I am so stupid that I care too much for someone but why would he say something like this and even while we were downstairs watching the drama and he even said that he will never fall in love which did hurt a little.

And that's when I realised that I was falling for him but now....

It just feels stupid.

I huffed as I made up my mind and I was going to ignore him as much as I can from now on.

I went inside my bathroom as I cleanend my face and looked at myself in the mirror.

"Am I ugly? Or fat maybe?" I questioned myself as I hit my head lightly with my hand and chuckled.

"What the hell y/n stop this,you are stronger then this and you have been so strong the whole time and why the hell are you breaking yourself over a man" I said to myself as I looked in the mirror and smiled.

I went to my bedroom as I laid down on my bed and closed my eyes to sleep.

*Morning*

I woke up to the sunlight that hit my face as I shut my eyes tightly and got up .

I walked inside the bathroom to do my morning routine and after that I opened the door of my room to go and have breakfast.

As I did I saw Yoongi who was coming out of his room as well and I stopped as he was struggling to get downstairs.

I didn't know what should I do.

Help the man who just broke my heart before even I started to have feelings for him but how will he get down....

'Fine I will help him but only one last time y/n'.

I said to myself as I walked towards him and held his shoulder as I helped him get downstairs.

"i can do it myself" He said coldly as I looked at him and he was looking at me as well.

THIS IS TOOO CLOSE!!!

I turned my head on the other side as I went downstairs and left him where he was.

Well he was the one who asked me to not help so I did that.

I sat down on the table as I looked at the members and smiled at thme and so did too grandmother.

I saw Yoongi who was coming downstairs slowly and looked around the table and I stopped breathing as the only seat left was beside me.

I gulped nervously as I looked at him and he looked at me now.

He sat down beside me as licked my lip which were dry now and we all started to have breakfast.

How am I going to get over him while this stuffs keep happeining god!!

I barely ate anything today and to be honest I am a big eater so everyone looked at me as some furrowed their eyebrows or some looked at me angrily.

And the person who was beside me was eating normally.

"What is this y/n,you barely ate anything" Grandmother asked me in a worried voice.

"I am not hungry today" I said as I pressed my lips together and smiled a little and looked down.

"Y/n don't tell me you have started dieting because you don't need that stuff okay?"Jin said as he looked at me and furrowed his eyebrows and I nodded.

I didn't felt like eating anything today as I got up from the table and excused myself and I knew that I will be getting lectures from Namjoon,Jin,Hoseok and grandmother as well.

They have always told me eat till I am full..

I went to my room as I took a bath and felt fresh now.

I got downstairs as I thought of taking a walk in the garden to clear some thoughts which were making me sad.

I sat down on the grass as I looked at the lake which looked so pretty.

I smelled the fresh air as it hit my face gently which made me smile.

"Hey" I heard someone from behind as I looked and it was Jin.

"Hii" I said in a flat voice.

"What's wrong?" He said as he sat down beside me.

"Nothing" I said as he sighed and nodded.

"You can talk to me you know that right?" He said as he placed his hand around my shoulder and brought me close to him.

He was like a big brother to me who always took care of me and made sure I ate properly which I had never felt before because my brother didn't do that stuffs.

"I think I like him" I said honestly now because I couln't keep it inside anymore and I needed someone to talk to as well because tommorow is going to be very hard for me.

It will be my mother's birthday and I cannot even go to her grave because my father killer her and said that she didn't deserved to be buried as he had burned her body...

"And did you confessed to him" He said and I shook my head.

"I was going to yesterday but he started to act cold towards me and is now ignoring me as well" I said and looked at him and smiled.

"And besides that,it's my mothers birthday Jin" I said and my voice cracked as I mentioned her.

He looked at me as he widened his eyes and brought me in a tight hug and caressed my back softly because I had told him about her

"I miss her so much" I said as I sobbed in his chest and he tried to calm me down as he kept telling me that it's alright.

"So what would you like to do tommorow on your mother's birthday huh?" Jin said as he made me look at him and wiped my tears away.

"I don't know usually I used to just look at some old pictures of her but I guess now I don't even have that" I said as I sighed.

"It's alright okay,we are here for you and if you need a shoulder to cry on.I am always here for you and don't think much of it,we can celebrate it by taking you to your favourite ice cream shop" He said as he tried to cheer me up and I didn't say anything as I nodded simply.

We talked the whole time as we went back inside the mansion and I went to my room as I thanked Jin.

I sat down and looked outside the window as I saw the moon.

I sighed sadly as I remebered my mother and a tear fell from my eyes.

"I miss you so much" I said to myself as I cried and fall asleep because I wasn't feeling up the whole day and besides I was not feeling hungry.