Chapter seven: Funerals bring people together

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The alcohol running through the pair's bloodstream was now long gone. Lucifer was holding his end of the deal and had teleported the human and himself to Earth. Currently the two of them were standing on a lawn with gravestones surrounding them; in the near distance was a white church. The flag outside had been lowered to a half and Jeremy sucked in a breath when he realised that this was it. The outside of the church was empty but he faintly heard Lucifer mutter, "Just in time." A minute or two later, the church doors opened. Jeremy's father, along with his brother and other family members, held a beautiful white casket, covered in flowers, and carried it to the awaiting car.

Silent tears were streaming down his dad's face and Jeremy wanted nothing more than to go over and hug him. His brother had put on a brave face, desperately trying to keep the tears at bay while the men heard his mother wail loudly by the church doors, falling to her knees, "My baby!"

"Mum!" Jeremy suddenly yelled and ran to get her. He heard Lucifer sigh but promptly ignored him as he trailed behind him at a slower pace. The boy reached his mother in no time but before he could pass the threshold of the church, his whole body started burning, forcing him to stop. He tried again but the same thing happened, leaving him breathless. "Why can't I go in," the boy cried in despair as he kneeled on the soil in front of the church. "This is my Father's property and you belong to me now, which means you're trespassing." Lucifer wanted to say he felt sorry for the kid but he really didn't. He had made a deal, and talking to his family one last time wasn't part of it.

Jeremy watched as his brother came rushing back into the church to comfort their mum. "It's okay," he croaked out, "Don't cry. He's in a better place now." His mother sniffed, "But what if he's not?"

Jeremy's brother sighed and whispered, "You'll just have to believe that he is."

"I'm okay! I'm still... semi alive, please don't cry," Jeremiah pleaded but it fell of deaf ears as his family members merely felt a gush of wind sending goosebumps to their arms. "C'mon, let's go outside." Jeremy watched as his brother and mother left the church and followed up to the hearse. For the first time since the church had been emptied following the service, Jeremy noticed how many had bothered to show up. Surrounding him were people he had never spoken to and he frowned, Lucifer noticed from his position a few meters away and asked what was wrong. "You only have friends when you die," came his reply. Just for a small moment, a flicker really, the devil felt a smidge of remorse for the boy but it was gone with the wind when he remembered the future the boy now held. It wasn't a bright one.

"Let's go, human." Lucifer never really liked Earth, it was cold and it smelled weird, and now the human was going all sentiment on him. He really couldn't be asked to deal with another crying human; being in the presence of a dozen humans crying over the boy before him was exhausting enough. It was easy to point out who never really knew Jeremy— the ones who decidedly were only his friends after his murder. None of those cried. They were instead huddled together looking around awkwardly or staring at their feet.

"You promised I could watch my funeral, well it's not done yet," Jeremy almost cried in frustration and watched as the man studied his face closely. While the service had finished, the casket had yet to be lowered into the ground, and the hearse was currently being prepped for transport. He nodded silently in reply and started following the now moving hearse. It was driving slow enough for friends and family to follow behind as it turned down the path that would subsequently end in his final resting place on Earth. It was kind of like a parking spot, Lucifer snorted at his thoughts, making the boy look at him with a frown. Why would he be laughing at a funeral? The man quickly straightened out his face and resumed as if nothing had happened.

A few short minutes later, the hearse stopped close to a dug out hole in the ground. The boy frowned, "That's not a nice place to put me." Lucifer accidentally let out a short burst of laughter before he mentally slapped himself. He needed a little more self-control. "That's what happens when you worship my Father instead of myself."

"As if we would worship the devil, that's just ludicrous!"

Lucifer side-eyed him, "Must be why you don't have a boyfriend." Jeremy's head snapped up to meet his, causing his mob of curls to bounce around, "I don't have a boyfriend because guys are like parking spots, the good ones are taken and the rest are handicapped, wanting me for the wrong reasons."

His lips curled at his analogy, "Well, I believe all parking spots are good, and if it's taken then you ram the other's away... or share," he winked, "Never stop before you get what you want. That's a life lesson." Jeremy shook his head dejectedly at his comment and turned back to his funeral; he couldn't believe he almost forgot he was here and now his casket was halfway to the ground already. The small crane that was lifting the casket suddenly groaned and stopped before letting the casket free fall a good half meter. The crowd sucked in a sharp breath and someone let out a shriek.

Jeremy felt like hiding behind his hands, "I'll still be causing problems even after my death." In the corner of his eye, he saw Lucifer quickly lower his arm from flicking it around in small but precise movements. Curiously he eyed the man, "Did you do this? Are you trying to sabotage my funeral?" He asked but the devil just smiled innocently, "I would never." The truth was that Lucifer was growing immensely bored and he wanted nothing more than for this funeral to be over so he could leave this god-filled land, it was making his skin crawl but he had to uphold his deal.

The crowd had breathed in relief when the machine started operating perfectly again and the casket hit the ground with a light thud. Rain started falling from the sky when the hole was beginning to get filled, "Oh how poetic," he snorted. It was weird seeing his own funeral but he caught himself feeling oddly distant from it. It was kind of like watch a movie, because he wasn't really dead so he pulled his attention from his own demise to his family. The rain had caused his schoolmates and fake friends to leave, while his family seemed rooted in place and the boy wondered if they had even noticed the rain yet.

No one spoke a word as they stared with wide teary eyes at the gravestone. Even Lucifer kept his mouth shut and refrained from complaining like an impatient child.

The minutes turned into an hour of pure silence when Jeremy noticed his brother and dad look at each other and nod. Together they lightly laid a hand each on Jeremy's mum, "Let's go home, mama."

She took a sharp breath, almost getting dizzy as a result, "Is he really gone?"

"He's dead, ma."

"Not again," she cried.

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