Locked Away Vol. 1

Troubles

Trying the best I could with my weak fingers, I was holding on tightly to a light pole outside near the entrance of the all girls side.

Mom was completely embarrassed seeing her own flesh and blood act like this, but what choice did I have? In order to make me happy, thinking my mom would do right by letting me go into the boy's side. I was sadly mistaken. 15 minutes must of passed by before my mom finally got me into that pink, flowery, girly classroom of horror. Once forced in there, all I could do was keep to myself. All the other girls would play as mommies and be princesses at playtime. Me? Oh I played out back in the playground. But I did the most unthinkable thing in my life that got me grounded later on. I stacked up some plastic stepping blocks up against the fence that separated the boys from the girls playgrounds. I climbed over that fenced and walked straight into heaven.

"Eww!" yelled a boy. "There's a girl on our side!" another boy yelled. "Cooties!" all of them screamed.

Shocked, I ran towards them to try to play, but all they did was huddle more close towards the back entrance to the classroom. No sooner after that their teacher came out, Mr. Collins. He grabbed me by the arm and took me back to that horrid room of pinkness that was my classroom. Little did I know that classroom would be my school till I was 10.

Later that day, my mom picked up Caleb and I. My mom was scolding me though, I wasn't really listening to what she said. All I could do was just stare at my lap, having tears stream down my face and silently cry.

The next day wasn't so good for some part of it. Once all of the girls had gotten inside the classroom, Miss Kreash let us out to the playground. "Miss Kreash, you said we needed to talk about Lucy's behavior from yesterday, correct?" my mother asked with concern. "Um ... yes we do. The way she acted I have seen it before and experienced it myself with my own child." Miss Kreash explained. "Your daughter may be transgender and might be suffering with anxiety from that as well."

"Transgender?" my mother questioned. "Why I've never heard of such a ... repulsive ... word in all my life." she said with disgust. "No, no, no it's perfectly normal Mrs. Wilson, in fact ... I was thinking on putting Lucy in the boys classroom and see how she does from there."

My mom was completely enraged by that. "I SHALL NOT HAVE MY LITTLE GIRL WITH BOYS! I RAISED HER TO BE A GIRL! IS THAT CLEAR?"

I was utterly depressed at this point. Shattered that my own so called "caring" mom didn't support me and help me take away this "Fake me".

Later on that evening after supper, I could faintly hear my mom yelling from my bedroom. "Gorge, I cannot describe of how much disappointed I am in our daughter. I mean trying to act like a boy and defying god of what he created her to be! A-And this ... transgender ... nonsense is out of alignment." mother scowled. "Mari, calm down. We'll think of something ... after all we are her parents, we will just look at some therapists, see if they can straighten her out."

About 4 weeks later, mom and dad took me out to therapy. I feared the worst was to come.