control ⇢ the maze runner / thomas [1] ✓

Chapter Thirty-Four

"All my life, people telling me just who I am. They don't
wanna know, they don't really understand. Too many
people tryna tell me to be practical, only think that I am one dimensional. But I can feel it, there's a fire raging underneath. Burning through the pages, here I am,
coming clean. I'm sick of lying to myself, gotta live
the truth. And now I've got to do what I've gotta do. This is where I should be. There ain't no other place
where my soul really sings."
—Sterling Knight, Got To Believe

CONTROL,
CHAPTER THIRTY-FO

BECAUSE MOST GLADERS typically slept outside, it was a tight squeeze. They had all been distributed evenly through the rooms, with blankets and pillows. Ruby had opened up her doors to Leo and some of the younger boys, wanting to be as comfortable as possible. Leo would probably be taking Minho's cot later that night though, and Ruby would invite one of the boys inside from the hallway.

It was difficult, but they would manage. Hopefully. Hopefully they would manage. All she could do was hope. All any of them could do was hope.

The Homestead grew unnaturally silent. At first she thought everyone was asleep, but everyone was wide awake — petrified. That's why they were so silent. Everyone was weirdly quiet. It was like they were afraid to be noticed.

After handing out a few blankets, Ruby joined Newt, Alby, Minho, and Thomas in one of the upstairs bedroom. They were continuing the conversation from earlier. Ruby just went along because she had seen it happen. Tiredly, she squeezed in next to Newt on the small cot. Aside from the bed and two chairs, which Minho and Thomas occupied, there was only a crooked dresser and a little table. A lamp rested atop the small table, proving a tiny bit of light. Outside, the murky gray sky continued to watch them all. It promised nothing good.

"This is the closest I've come so far to hangin it all up. Shuck it all and kiss a Griever goodnight. Supplies cut, bloody gray skies, walls not closing. But we can't give up, and we all know it. The buggers who sent us here either want us dead or they're givin us a spur. This or that, we gotta work our arses off till we're dead or not dead." Newt was the first to break the silence. Ruby had the feeling that it was meant to be inspiring, but it only made her feel less hopeful.

If Newt was getting to that point, what hope did the rest of them have? She'd never seen Newt as anything less than hopeful and happy, not that she could remember. She wasn't saying that the boy was always happy, but he seemed to be the glue that held them all together. If the glue dissolved, then everything else would inevitably fall apart.

Ruby rubbed her eyes tiredly. She felt worse now than she ever had before. Everything was so... screwy. Newt looked tired too, but it was Alby who looked worn down. He looked lost somewhere else, probably in his own sad thoughts. He looked depressed, his eyes sunken and blank. Hollow. The Changing had lived up to its name. Look at what it had done to Ben. To Alby. Ruby wondered if she was broken. Or perhaps because of who raised her, maybe she never saw the horrors that they did.