Until You Say It [Completed]

Kabanata 6

We went to a morning mass just like what we do every Sundays. We went to the nearest church from the mansion in which four body guards are with us.

My fever gone after a day. So I'm a bit carefree now except for the fact that I'm still feeling heartbroken for what happened between I and Yshara. It was too fast to even think that things will turn out that way, because I thought we're going okay.

The thought of her and the thought that she rejected me, too firm, that I had no choice but to give it up, was all my mind almost every hour of my day now. "Problem with school?" Si mommy na nakahalata na sa pagiging tahimik ko nitong nakaraang araw. Nag-angat ng tingin sa akin si daddy and then resumed on his iPad scrolling down for current news. I am usually quiet but not as quiet as I am today.

"Just..." I don't know how to put it in words. I'm not sure if my parents ever had an idea about Yshara but sometimes I assumed since Jordan usually comes to the mansion when I'm not with Yshara, those were from the old days. "Just felt under the weather for 2 days so I guess...probably this is the aftershock, being quiet." Ngumiti sa akin si mommy at marahang hinaplos ang likod ko.

"Give her time to think it over. Time to think over you again." Mom grinned with what she whispered. Hindi na ako nakapagsalita pa at tinuon na lamang ang atensiyon sa Krus ni Hesus, if I could pray for a new thing today, that would be Yshara's happiness. We were early for the second morning mass, may sampung minuto pa bago ito magsimula.

As I just stared at the cross, my dad stand to greet someone and give that person a slow and firm hand shaking. Sa gulat sa kung sino ito ay napatayo rin ako. It's Yshara's family, I remembered meeting them before, kaya magalang ko rin silang binati. Tumabi si daddy kay Tito Kal, at si mommy naman kay Tita Cerys. I would have enjoyed this situation more if only Yshara doesn't feel awkward with having me next to her.

"Hi. How are you?" It's not nearly a week since we last met and since we had that rejection talk.

"I'm good." As if she's dismissing me already. I didn't pushed my luck, believing not my day today. We remained silent as our parents talk about business with each other.

Tahimik pa rin kami hanggang magsimula na ang misa. And down to the homily, father talked about, receiving and giving. He emphasized on how we should give whenever we our blessed by God, that we don't stop from only receiving blessings from Him but also making sure we share our blessings to everyone right after.

During Our Father I was hesitant to hold her hand, but mom told me I should, and reminded myself that we are not in a romantic drama but we are inside the house of God and that we our with Him now. Marahan kong kinuha ang kamay niya, she didn't flinched or anything when I did that. In fact, she sincerely allowed me to. Somehow I felt hopeful as we all sing together, but erased that thought simply because it should be really done in the first place, this is probably one of the casual events we will never take a chance to run away from.

Nang matapos ang misa ay nagkayayaan na mag-breakfast kami nang sabay-sabay. Kung close pa rin kami ni Yshara paniguradong nag-uumapaw ang kasiyahan ko sana ngayon. Mas naramdaman kong lumalim ang pagkakailang namin ni Yshara sa isa't-isa. Even we're sitting next to each other in a rounded table enough for the six of us, she'd always look on her phone, not really minding I was there. I somehow felt offended as I felt unfamiliar sting on my chest.

Sinubukan ko na lamang makisali sa usapan nila daddy at tito tungkol sa negosyo. Napansin ko naman ang pagbaling ni mommy kay Yshara. "Ikaw Yshara hija, what are your plans in college? Though you still have a year before then."

Nag-angat ng tingin si Yshara. I felt her tensed and shifted her position a bit. "She's planning to take accountancy mom, and probably pursue law after." I sighed right after. Hindi naman nagreklamo si Yshara sa ginawa ko. Somehow she relaxed a bit with what I did, I felt a little happy about it. If only she can still allow me to be her friend.