[wdw]sickfics

j.m.<i wanna leave>

jonahs POV

it's currently 3am here in la and im feeling alot more broken than i did yesterday.

the hate keeps getting stronger and my life keeps harder.

weeks ago my life was perfectly fine, i was living my best life with my best friends, then next thing i know, the hate piled in, and my depression got deeper.

also being kinda young, but the oldest in the band, also made me realize, im not even useful?

they don't need me anymore

right?

3rd person POV

there was doubt about it.

jonah wanted to leave.

he wanted to start new.

he wanted to be able to look down on his band mates and be happy for them, because right now being happy for him wasn't an option.

jonah had it all planned out when the boys left, he would leave too.

he took it very seriously, he knew today was the day.

of course he knew so many people would miss him, but he didn't wanna stay alive and ruin the boys life's anymore because the truth is, he's been unhappy for a really long time.

jonahs POV

"jonah, come on itll be so much fun, i wanna spend some time with you" corbyn begged trying to get me to come with him to the mall. "no corbyn, i don't want to."

he didn't say anything and just stormed off.

after i heard the front door shut, i knew corbyn had left.

so i darted upstairs and ran into the bathroom.

i looked at myself in the mirror and just got lost in thoughts.

you have to leave.

it has to happen.

fuck everyone.

a couple tears dribbled down my face as i felt emptiness.

i needed help, and i knew that.

but why get help when you can end it yourself? right?

i walked into corbyn, zach, and i's shared bedroom, and walked over to the bed and dropped on my knees.

i reached my hand under the bed, and pulled out a box.

i took the lid off and found it.

the only thing that was making me happy nowadays, and making me feel myself.

a gun.

im leaving. without telling anyone im just going to end my life, and the suffering.

my friend could tell something was wrong, but she wasn't really my friend? we just meant over an app. i told her everything that was happening, but she just told me to stay strong. but i couldn't.

i stood up, and took a breath, and held the gun up to my head, as i felt tears start to fall down my face like a river.

here's to messing up.

here's to being alive.

here's to fucking up everyone's head.

as i put my hand on the trigger, when someone came busting through the door, i looked up through my tears, and it was him.

it was corbyn.

corbyns POV

i could tell something was wrong with him.

i knew he wasn't happy, i knew he had depression, i knew the signs, ive been there before, shit fucks you up.

after i asked him to leave to go to the mall i blankly got shut down.

i walked down the stairs, and walked outside and sat by the pool, when i heard cries coming from inside.

i got up and ran inside up to our room.

when i burst through the door, i saw something i thought i would never have to see.

jonah had a gun held up to the side of his temple with his hand on the trigger.

"j-jo" i cry out hoping to get a respond, which i ended up getting seconds later.

"corbyn get o-o-out you need to leave, let me do this" he said crying harder pressing the gun farther into his head.

"no please, i need you to. you can't leave please. put the gun down"

"i can't corbyn im going through with it.' "no you don't have to jonah. i love you, your the most precious thing that's ever happened to me before. please"

"im sorry corbyn i don't believe you. goodbye" "NO DON-" i immediately got cut off by the gun going off.

i felt too scared to open my eyes, but once i did, i saw jonah, with a bullet right through his head, laying dead on the carpet.

my heart dropped.

my breathing stopped.

my tears flowed once again.

i walked over to jonah and dropped down beside him, and layed my head on his bloody chest not caring at this point.

"why jo? why? i needed you. why did you feel like you had to go? why didn't you talk to me. i love you so much. and ill see you very soon." i say kissing his forehead.

i take the gun out of his hand and lay down beside him.

i place it on my temple, and quickly lock hands with jonah before pulling the trigger.

that night, they lost 2 members of why don't we.

the next day, they lost 3 more.

{literally all of this is how im feeling right now, n some of that is true events👌}