[wdw]sickfics

z.h.<insecure>

it was 2 minutes before the show started and zach was staring at himself in his dressing room mirror. he was standing there shirtless looking at himself from every angle. sideways, from the front and from the back.

"im too fat" he said to himself feeling his insecurities get the best of him like usual.

he felt some tears fall down his face, then a knock on the door. he quickly wiped away his tears and yelled for the person to come in.

he quickly slipped his shirt on and stood away from the mirror. as the door opened it revealed a curious with his stage attire on.

"you messed the stage meeting. what where you doing?" jonah asked sitting on the couch in front of zach. shit.

"i-i-i fell asleep. ya boy was tired." zach said with a nervous chuckle hoping jonah believed his lie. "ok we have to be on stage let's go" jonah said yanking zachs arm.

he let out a slight whimper due to the worthless cuts on his arm he put there himself.

"did i hurt you" jonah asked feeling suddenly guilty. "no you didn't jo, ill meet you there okay? i uh have to brush my teeth" jonah nodded and ran out of the room believing zachs little white lie...again.

"fuck zach. your worthless? what are you doing? pushing your best friend away. your fat and there's nothing you can do about it" zach thought to himself.

it made him go crazy. super crazy. he yelled and screamed at his mirror shoving everything of his dresser with heavy breathing.

glass could be heard shattering against the walls, his sobs could be heard from the fans rooms away.

zach calmed himself down and looked at himself once more. he eyed his body up and down disgusted at what was underneath.

underneath to zach was a worthless 18 your old boy, who's too fat to live, but to everyone else, zach was perfect. his body was beautiful, his personality was wonderful.

but when zach would look at himself in the mirror, his never saw himself. he saw a monster staring back at him pointing out every flaw he had.

he knew the show was beginning, but he couldn’t bring himself to step out of the dressing room and walk upon the stage.

he took his shirt off and threw it across the room. “you need to lose weight zach” he whispered to himself.

he was beyond upset he ever let himself get this heavy, he thought he was watching his weight, when truly he wasn’t. and that scared him.

☮️

across the hall stood a sad jonah listening to every word his best friend spoke about himself.

jonah was just supposed to come get zach and get him on stage, but once he heard glass shatter and the sobs, he knew his friend was suffering and he definitely wasn’t going to let him suffer alone.

“zach” he said hesitantly knocking on the door.

when he didn’t get a response he opened up the door. when he did it revealed a zach staring at himself in the mirror once again.

jonah sighed and walked over to him.

“what’s wrong with me?” zach asked still staring into the mirror.

“there’s nothing wrong with you? what are you talking about” jonah asked. jonah was shocked at the sudden question.

“im not like you and i wanna be. im fucking ugly, im fat. why” zach asked now sobbing.

jonah looked up at him and felt so much sympathy for the boy.

jonah knew singers would become insecure of themselves, hell jonahs been here before.

on the bathroom floor, sobbing into corbyns arms, telling corbyn how he felt. corbyn sang to him and told him he was perfect. after that day jonah never felt that way again.

he knelt down beside zach and brought him into his warm embrace.

he whipped his tears away and began singing.

“your amazing just the way you are” he sang into zachs ear. zach smiled, but it quickly faded once he saw his stomach hanging down.

“no im not. im fat” he began sobbing again.

“zach stop it” jonah yelled at him. jonah stood up and flared his arms in the air.

“can you listen to yourself man? your fucking perfect zach from your head to your toes. your body is amazing, your face is adorable, you have an amazing life and you have never failed to put a smile on someone’s face. your not fat zach, your far from it. i love you for you.

and please don’t ever think about suicide because i read your letters, ive read your notes. do you really think it’s a good idea to leave us? no zach. i understand you feel worthless and useless, but your not. i can’t be the one to find you laying lifeless on the bathroom floor. i don’t want any of us to be the one to find you lifeless on the bathroom floor.

i don’t wanna have to go to your funeral, not at age 18. i don’t wanna see you get buried. i don’t wanna be the one to call your parents, and i especially don’t wanna lose you. your my best friend. we’ve all gone through it once, we can’t do it again. not with you zach.” jonah spoke from the heart.

“im insecure not suicidal” zach chuckled out whipping his tears away.

jonah pulled zach into a hug. “being insecure leads to suicide. how do you think we lost jack?” jonah said holding zach tighter.

“i miss him” zach said gripping jonahs shirt.

“we all do”