"Midnight Memories"

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T W E N T Y  F O U R

"Hey.. are you feeling better?" I flinch when gen's cold hand comes in contact with my bare shoulder. She notices this and sighs "what's wrong?" Her voice is calm, she's so oblivious to the fact that i heard their conversation and that the fire of curiousty in the pit of my stomach is just growing, her every word only adding fuel to it.

"I'm fine." My voice is more stern that i intend for it to be but its just too much to handle for one night, and that to right before the year ends. My chest feels heavy as i try to bottle up my feelings and fling it away but its stuck with me, floating around until i decide to crack it open and let all my pent up emotions spill. Right now was definitely not the night for that.

I gnaw at my bottom lip as i stare out into the large park outside, covered in a thick layer of trees. A cold wind wraps its fingers around our skin in a gentle touch and i feel goosebumps rise on the surface of my sensitive skin, making me shiver.

Gen looks out into the distance with me before slipping a packet in front of me, i look down to see a half smoked pack of cigarettes. I did not fancy the idea of smoking as a habit but gen was quite the chimney, whereas i was more of a yearly smoker.

I only ever smoked if i was just too stressed or if i was in a mood, which was hardly ever. But right now i wanted nothing more than to smoke at least 2 of these pesky little buggers before being at the slightest bit of ease. The first time i picked one of these up was after jason had quite literally ruined me, i smoked 3 in a row that night before Samuel caught me on the rooftop of our guest house and took them away from me, telling me it wasn't good and that he would never tell mum and dad because he knew my pain to some extent.

But them i made it a frequent habit to smoke at least four times a week, i knew gen smoked often at the time so i'd smoke with her. She used to protest of course, until i broke down and just told her why i was doing it.

And although pain and stress doesn't justify my actions, sometimes you just need a distraction.. even if it kills you a little.

"Was it him again.." she speaks cautiously, as if the girl standing in front of her isn't her best friend but a ticking time bomb ready to blow up the instant she touched it or even breathed. I sigh, not knowing how to respond nor being able to lie because she knew me better than i knew myself. She just didn't know that he was just one of the few things on my mind right now, eating at my thoughts and fears.

"I won't lie to you, i saw the text" she takes a quick drag of her cig, blowing out the air before she continues to speak "Babe you really need to take this to the cops, he's dangerous. I mean he escaped prison somehow! Imagine what else he could do-" i cut her off with a groan "that's the problem gen! He already has done things! He's known i've been living in that apartment for so long now! Its not long before he finds out about nathan!" I tugging at my messy hair so much that my roots start to throb.

She gives me a sympathetic look, to which i just take a drag of my own cig. "And then what?" She turns her head to look at me, her face blank of any expression "what do you mean and then what? What will i tell nathan hm? That my crazy ex boyfriend is an absolute psychopath who raped me, got me pregnant and is currently stalking me?!" I don't realize i'm yelling until i see a figure standing behind me from the corner of my eye, frozen and in shock.

Nathan looks between us and i hope this reaction is to me smoking and not to everything i just yelled out. "What.. the actual fuck?" He emphasizes, his eyes wider than saucepans as he stares at me. Fear and regret begins to take over my body as i meet his burning gaze, he looks angry and... disgusted?

Of course he's disgusted! The girl he keeps sticking his dick into was sexually assaulted by her own boyfriend, impregnated and miscarried the child all in the span of one year!.

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