Potential for Darkness (Peter Pan)//(Robbie Kay)

53 ~ Aftermath

(Okay so I finished writing this at four in the morning so please excuse the shitty writing, I'll come back and edit it later, I just really wanted to give you guys an update)

I'm so so sorry for how long it took me to post this chapter. University classes and the work has been hell

<<<Day 211>>>

Adelina's mind was still imbued with the tranquil, senseless brumes of sleep. Distantly, on the other side of the untroubled haze, she was aware of pale sunlight filtering through the windows. It was time to get up. Still, she allowed herself to sink deeper into the coziness of the bed, a safe and warm haven from the harsh cold that would await her the moment she stepped outside. She hadn't slept that well in weeks. No nightmares, no foreboding sense of doom waking her up in the middle of the night, not even any trouble falling asleep...

Adelina sat bolt upright, clutching the covers to her otherwise bare chest. She was in Pan's room, she suddenly realized with dawning horror and recollection; she had been sleeping in his bed. The memories of the previous night came crashing back onto her in a tumultuous rush, the mere thought of it enough to make her blush. But the bed was empty and Pan was nowhere in sight, presumably having woken up earlier and decided to escape the unpleasant situation before it could unfold. Quickly, her mind reeling, she gathered her garments that were strewn about the floor and hastily put them on.

Drawing back the curtains and peeking out of the window, she made sure that the coast was clear before stealthily creeping out of Pan's treehouse. She made a beeline for her own, needing to freshen up and a clean change of clothes. It was still early in the morning though, early enough that still plenty of lost boys were gathered around the campfire eating their breakfast, and the lost girl cringed as embarrassment flamed on her cheeks, fervently hoping that none of them had spotted her exiting their leader's room.

She was practically running as she reached her treehouse. Breathing a shaky sigh of relief as she closed the door behind her, she shut herself into the secure privacy of her own room. She leaned heavily against the wood and closed her eyes.

How could she have done something so stupid? she berated herself.  She had been the one to lay down the ground rules and prohibit anything from happening between them, she had been the one to insist on keeping their distances, so how could she have caved in so easily? Admittedly, at that moment, she had never wanted anything more in her life, but nonetheless she-

Adelina caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror. A dreadful silence settled in her mind as all thoughts left her. Apprehensively, terrified of what she would see, she inched towards her reflection.

She'd previously been too preoccupied by her embarrassement and frustration to notice the dark stains on her clothes or hands, yet as she gaped at herself through the mirror, it was now all she could see. Disbelievingly, almost to catch herself in a dream, she ran her fingers over her features. Dried blood was smeared over her face and ran down her cheeks and throat, rusting in patches in the creases of her skin.

The memories of the previous evening slammed into her. She was unable to breathe.

Horror flooded her once more. But more than that, guilt.

Guilt because she did not regret her actions. The pirate had deserved it. He'd been an enemy, a monster and a murderer. He had been the one to take Serge's life.

Guilt because she'd broken her own promise; to prove herself better than Pan and his cruel ways by never killing anyone. She'd sworn to herself that she'd never become a murderer.