Kihyun strolls forward, a somber smile on his face. The weather is clear, not a cloud in sight. The sun is bright and shining down on him. A tear slips from his eye as he notices Kiyeon already sat beside her father. She was only sixteen, but here she was, dress growing muddy, after burying her mentor, her leader in life.
Kihyun drops to his knees beside the freshly finished grave, his suit growing as muddy as Kiyeon's pink dress. He places a bouquet of white orchids on the dirt and wipes his tears. He had to be strong, for Kiyeon.
"Dad, does this ever stop hurting?" Kiyeon asked as she leaned on her dad. Kihyun broke at that question. Tears rushed down his cheeks and dripped onto the dirt.
"No, sweetheart, it doesn't. You just make room around it and try to keep pushing on." Kihyun spoke wisely, not bothered one bit by his tears. He laughed dryly and let them fall.
"You idiot. You didn't have to take that bullet for me. I would have been just fine. But here you are you bastard, six feet under, leaving me alone to raise our kids. I'm so sorry, sweetheart." Kihyun cried and held his daughter tightly as she sobbed.
"How did you two even get in that situation?" Kiyeon asked. Kihyun shivered as he remembered.
"A man was about to do disgusting things to me when Shownu found me. The man pulled out a gun, aimed at me, but Shownu took the bullet." Kihyun said emotionlessly. He raked his fingers through Kiyeon's hair to soothe her sobs.
"I'm sorry I went to that party and you had to come get me. If I hadn't, dad would still be with us." Kiyeon sobbed. Kihyun sat shellshocked that his daughter felt it was her fault.
"Kiyeon, baby, this wasn't your fault. You went and had fun right? That's what's important to us, your happiness. Please don't think you caused this, baby." Kihyun consoled the teenager gently. He kissed her forehead and wiped away her mascara tears.
"But it is my fault, dad. I went, got too drunk to walk home, and now I lost one of my dads. What can you think of me, dad? I'm terrible!" Kiyeon wept into her dad's chest. Kihyun stood up and picked his daughter up into his arms.
"Come on, sweetheart. Let's get you home." Kihyun whispered as he noticed her falling asleep to the sound of his heartbeat. She must have tired herself out with all of her sobbing and whimpering at her loss.
His heartbeat. What was keeping him alive. He always fell asleep to the sound of Shownu's, what is he to do now? Listen to music? Pathetic. He couldn't even keep himself safe, why did he let Shownu take that damned bullet?
Why on Earth would Kihyun walk around dark alleys at midnight? For his daughter. His pride and joy in life. His flesh and blood and everything that made her, his daughter.
Kihyun remembered a song Shownu used to sing to him when he slept. It wasn't exactly positive, but he loved Shownu's voice as he sang. He began to softly sing.
Hello there
Is anyone there?
Where is
Is there anyone
To answer me?
Is anyone there?
You're disappearing, more and more, without a sound
From me, without any reason
Was everything a misunderstanding?
Were we looking at each other in a dream?
Why am I alone?
Among all the people surrounding me
Why am I alone?
I'm all alone, I need someone
I need someone right now
Hello, is anyone there?
Anyone who can accept me?
Is anyone here?
Come to me, without a sound
Hold me, without a reason
Why am I alone?
Among all the people surrounding me
Tears fell down his cheeks as Kihyun pulled into their driveway. He parked Shownu's car and moved to carry his daughter into her bedroom. He gently picked her up and placed her onto her queen sized bed. He removed her muddy shoes.
"I'm so sorry, sweetheart." Kihyun whispered and kissed her forehead. He pulled the blankets farther up on her body and left the room.
He wandered into his bedroom and picked up his wedding photo. He sat it back down and cried harder than he ever had before. The tears seemed endless as the dripped onto his carpet. He took off his muddy outfit and had a long shower.
He stood under the stream and just let the hot water burn his skin. He felt he deserved that pain in relation to what his husband went through with the bullet.
"I loved you!" Kihyun shouted but was drowned out by the water. He sat down on the shower floor and sobbed into his knees. He let the water rush over his crumpled form as he let himself be vulnerable for a bit.
Eventually, he heard knocking on the door. The water had run cold as it continued to hit Kihyun, feeling like little knives poking into his skin.
"Dad? Please don't do anything stupid. I need you." Kiyeon cried from the other side of the bathroom door. Kihyun stood up and quickly got dry and dressed at the call of his daughter. He opened the door and hugged her face to his chest.
"I won't, sweetheart don't worry. Daddy isn't going anywhere, I promise." Kihyun promised. But how could he be so sure? People die everyday, even when they don't see it coming. How could he be so sure he wouldn't die here and now from the heartbreak he was feeling?
Thank you for twenty thousand reads. Don't be shy, leave a comment hating me for hurting you. I know I cried writing it haha.
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Crossed ~ShowKi~
Fanfiction[COMPLETED] On everyone's 18th birthday, the name of their soulmate shall appear on their wrist or thigh; in the writing of their soulmate. One will have a name on their wrist, the other on their thigh. Shownu has seen the name Yoo Kihyun on his wri...
