[Jimin] - Don't Let Go

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"Stop being so stubborn and open your mouth." I held the spoon close to her mouth but she still didn't opened it.

"Y/N." I said in a warning tone. "You already fed me, for like 3 times this morning." I raised an eyebrow at her.

"So? Something wrong with that?" She held onto her stomach and groaned, leaning back. "I'm so full, do you want me to throw up?"

She whined. "You need to stay healthy. You need to eat a lot so that you'll get better." My words seemed to hit her hard.

Her eyes dropped and her lips curved downward. She scoffed. "You know that I'll never get better." She looked at me with teary eyes.

I quickly went towards her and hugged her. "What did I say about those negative words?" I caressed her shoulders.

"You'll get better, you'll be better." I cupped her cheeks and gave her aa little peck. "I love you." She looked at me before she removed my hands on her cheeks.

"I don't understand why you're still wasting your time on me. You should just go and find a new girlfriend, someone who doesn't have cancer!"

She furiously said with tears flowing down on her eyes. "I'm gonna die anytime soon, so just break up with me and go be hap—"

I pulled her to my embrace once again. I don't like it if she's being like this. I would be lying if I said I wasn't hurt by that.

"I'll never let you go." As my sentence ended she busted out crying. I can feel my tears fall too.

"I'm sorry." She said looking up at me. "I just didn't want to hurt you. I just want you to forget about me so that you won't be hurt when I'm gone." I cupped her cheeks once again.

"Y/N, you are not gonna die. We're still going to be married, we're still gonna buy a house, we're still gonna have kids. We're still gonna grow old together." Her eyes changed as she heard my words.

"Don't give up on me please." She held my hand. "I won't, I promise."

After that short conversation, more like an argument she decided to take a nap so I tucked her in.

I caressed her head, while she was slowly falling asleep. I stared at her and I can feel the tears fall once again.

Y/N has stage 4 leukemia. It has been a year and a half since we've discovered her illness, and everyday we prayed that she would get better.

The doctor said that we should never expect anything, so we should cherish the time with her while it still lasts.

Remembering those words just stabs my heart over and over again. We have been together for four years and I never would've thought that she'll end up like this.

She was cheerful, energetic. I just didn't know how that little ball of sunshine ended up with cancer.

Everyday we would laugh, everyday we would tell each other secrets, everyday we would tell each other our dreams.

And in my head I truly wished that we would someday reach those dreams, together.

Whenever her doctor would check on her I would hold her hand tight and give her a little kiss on her cheek.

Hoping that it'll give her motivation to get better.

But everyday we could see how her body becomes weaker and weaker. How her lips became paler. And how her movements became more sensitive.

But I didn't loose hope. I didn't gave up. I know she won't give up on me. She promised.

Her doctor called me and her parents to have a talk outside. "I'll be back honey." I said giving her a kiss on her forehead.

I was about to go when she held onto my wrist weakly. I bit my lip, trying my best not to cry. I looked back at her and she smiled.

"I love you."

I can feel my heart break a thousand more pieces. The way she said it weakly. The way she said it like she has no more strength.

"I love you too." I squeezed her hand a bit.

"I'm sorry if I'm being a burden. I'm sorry that we didn't got the chance to date outside. I'm sorry if I'm not gonna make it to our dreams. I'm sorry that I'm gonna break my promise." She said making me look at her confused.

"What do you mean? Y/N, don't scare me like that." Her other hand went to my cheek and caressed it softly.

Tears were now falling down from her eyes. "Jimin, I just want you to know that I love you more than anything in this world. You were my angel when I was on my dark times. You made me feel special. Jimin, I'm s-sorry..."

Her eyes slowly closed as her hands fell down. I can hear the sound that I didn't know that I'll be hearing.

Tears were now falling furiously on my face. "No, No!" I cried out. I can hear the door open. "Y/N!" Her mom cried out as she approached the bed.

I can feel the pain in my chest, I didn't know what to do. She was gone. She was gone.

I was crying my heart out that I didn't know that I was being dragged out of the door. I can feel my whole world go black.

I never thought that she'll be gone. We promised to grow old together, we promised to love each other even though we get ugly. I just didn't know that she'll leave me.

I never thought she'll let go.

She was the love of my life. She was more than I could ever ask and now she's gone.

"Jimin, can you please help me with Jaeyung." I was snapped out of my thoughts when I heard my wife shout.

I quickly wiped my tears away. "Coming." I got out of our room and went to the living room where I saw them.

"Are you okay?" She asked me, concerned as I took our baby from her. "Yeah, just tired." I looked at our little girl and couldn't help but smile.

"How is my little Y/N?" I pinched her cheeks lightly which made her giggle. "She has been crying last night, I think she missed you."

I smiled at her as I bit my lip refraining me from crying.

Even though you're not here with me, I'll still remember you.

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